5 Questions About Their Job To Ask On A First Date, So Skip The Small Talk
Figuring out what to talk about (and what not talk about) on a first date can be tricky. Do you ask the harmless, surface-level questions, or do you skip the small talk and go straight to the nitty gritty? Worry not! When you want to know about what your date is passionate about and what their day-to-day is like, these questions about their job to ask on a first date can give you a better understanding of who your date really is without feeling like you're prying.
I can't say I'm one of those people who particularly enjoys small talk. In fact, I dread it and try to avoid it at all costs. Plus, when you're on a date, you only have a limited amount of time to really get to know the person before you go your separate ways and decide if you want to see each other again. Consider trying not to waste too much time talking about the weather or how work was that day, but rather, ask them things that'll really make them think. People who are passionate about what they do usually love talking about it, and what is sexier than that? These five questions to ask your date about their job can give you insight into their lives, what they're passionate about, why they chose their careers, and ultimately, who they are as a person (without bombarding them with questions that sound super serious and daunting).
1. What does a day in the office look like for you?
This a more interesting way of asking what your date actually does at work. Sure, their title is "Account Executive," but what does that even mean? Asking your date about their day-to-day skips over the boring pleasantries and small talk about where they work or how long they've been there, and jumps right to the fun part: What does this interesting, new person do every day?
2. Do you like what you do?
While this question may seem like a given, unfortunately people don't always genuinely enjoy what they do. Maybe they tried really hard to find their idea of a perfect job, but it just wasn't available and they needed to work so they took whatever job they could find. Maybe they have a dream company they want to work for, but the only thing available in that office is a lower-level position where they would have to work their way up to what they actually want to do. Whatever it may be, asking them if they truly like what they do can help you learn a little bit more about them and their future aspirations.
3. Is this what you always wanted to do?
When I was growing up, I wanted to be a veterinarian, then a pastry chef, then a doctor, then a spy. Now, I'm a writer. You don't always end up doing the things you wanted to do when you were a kid, and there's nothing wrong with that. Asking your date about whether or not the job they're doing now is the job they always wanted gives you a little bit of insight to their childhood, which can be nice to know about. If it's not what they always wanted to do, it opens up a way to ask slightly deeper questions (if you think they're open to them), like what is, or why they changed their mind.
4. Why'd you choose this career?
Again, if you've felt out your date and think they wouldn't mind diving in a little deeper, you can ask them why they chose the career they're in right now. Learning why they do what they do can give you a glimpse at the kind of person your date is, the things they value most, and what they want from life.
5. Where do you see yourself in five years, work-wise?
If you and your date hit it off and end up in a relationship, it's normal to want to know where they see themselves in their career five, 10, 15 years from now. Are they in the same job? Have they worked their way up? Have they decided to pursue their dreams, if they aren't already? It can give you an idea of what they want from their future, and if the two of you are endgame, then, what your potential future might look like, too.
Keep these questions in your first date arsenal. When your next one comes around and you want to skip the small talk, pull one out! As the cliché saying goes, "You never know until you try." So, try! And don't be afraid to tell them about your career goals either. Someone who wants to get to know you will put in the effort to ask the right questions, so if they ask, it's probably a sign that they're interested. Four for you, Glenn Coco!