When it comes to #relationshipgoals, selflessness is one trait that ranks high on the list. After all, who doesn’t want a partner who cares deeply about your desires — so much so that sometimes, they’re willing to put their own aside? It’s worth knowing that certain Myers-Briggs personality types that will put you first, no matter what. And needless to say, this quality can definitely play an occasional role in your relationship satisfaction.
There are lots of situations in which this trait can come in handy, like when your SO orders some tom yum soup since they know you’re craving Thai (even though they wanted pizza), stays up late to help you prepare for a work presentation (even though they have to get up early), or makes sure you finish first during sex.
This rare form of selflessness comes naturally for certain MBTI personality types. Interestingly enough, those types share many common traits. For example, they tend to be Feeling — and that’s no surprise since this makes you more likely to be driven to make decisions based on your emotions and the people involved.
Looking for a partner who makes your needs a priority? Then consider dating one of these five MBTI types.
Caring, patient and sympathetic, an INFJ is the ideal person to vent to when you’ve had a bad day. Not only will they lend a non-judgmental ear, but they’ll also be dedicated to helping you find solutions to whatever challenges you’re currently grappling with. That’s why this type is known as The Counselor.
One of the INFJ’s most remarkable talents is that they can read your emotions quickly and accurately, meaning you might not even need to tell them that you’re feeling down, frustrated, or angry. They’ll be able to figure that out on their own, and better yet, they’ll be eager to do something about it. INFJs are not afraid of tackling complicated personal problems, and they can use their incredible insight to do so.
This type is known as The Nurturer — 'nuff said. Not only are ISFJs incredibly warm, considerate, dependable partners, but they’re also generous with their time, effort, and affection. They go above and beyond in everything they do, so basically, they’re bound to be Bae of the Year.
Since ISFJs are highly sensitive, they’re likely to consider your feelings with every decision they make. And they also value harmony, meaning they’ll always do whatever it takes to keep the peace, even if it means swallowing their pride or admitting they were wrong. ISFJs take their responsibilities and obligations seriously, so you know that if they said they’ll help you set up for that party or attend that networking event with you, they’ll be there no matter what.
This is another type that makes it a point to achieve a harmonious environment, so expect them to go to great lengths to make sure you feel comfortable, heard, respected, and loved. ESFJs are known for being incredibly loyal and conscientious, and they are skilled at not only identifying your needs but also doing their part to meet them. Unsurprisingly, this type is known as The Provider, and they can use their strong compassion and listening skills to help you through any difficult situation, whether it involves a work dilemma or a disagreement with your sister. ESFJs are so willing to take on your concerns and problems, in fact, that they will treat them as if they are their own. The Provider tends to feel a personal responsibility to help out whenever they can. So, it’s no shocker that volunteering is one of the most popular activities for ESFJs to get involved in.
Empathy is this personality type’s superpower, so you can expect them to always be in tune with your emotions and needs, as well as be able to see your point of view. ENFJs don’t mind helping you solve your personal problems — in fact, they enjoy doing so. That’s probably why this type is known as The Giver. And unsurprisingly, many ENFJs ultimately become humanitarians.
Not only are ENFJs loyal and responsible, but they’re also dedicated to helping you reach your full potential. So, if you’re hunting for a new job or need to stay up late studying for an exam, don’t be surprised if they swoop in and sacrifice their time to assist you in reaching your goals. Since ENFJs are deeply compassionate individuals, they can sometimes become over-involved and even neglect their own needs. But remember, they're coming from a genuine desire to help you feel your best.
The Healer is all about serving humanity and making the world a better place. So, don’t be surprised if they put their priorities aside when you’ve got the flu, or are dealing with a family crisis. INFPs are both considerate and thoughtful, and it makes them feel good to boost the well-being of those around them.
Like ENFJs, they’re also super committed to personal growth — not only for themselves, but also for their loved ones. That means they are likely to be super supportive through big life changes (and that inevitable quarter-life crisis). Since INFPs are highly empathetic, accommodating, and nonjudgmental, they will be able to see your perspective in almost any scenario, which definitely comes in handy during a conflict. They’ll often even put their own opinions and feelings aside in the interest of achieving mutual understanding.
Let’s be clear on one thing: A partner who puts you first shouldn't ignore their own needs. Ultimately, that can lead to mounting resentment and a slew of other problems. Rather, a selfless partner is one who can recognize when it’s worth putting your needs before their own, who doesn’t keep score of who did what, and who genuinely wants to make your life better, even if it means sacrificing their wishes from time to time. Sound appealing? Then consider seeking out one of the aforementioned personality types. Because dating a giver? Well, that’s the gift that keeps on giving.
