Why You Should Turn To A Pisces If Your Family's Holiday Dinner Gets Tense

by Rosey Baker
Stocksy/ GiC

Holiday dinners are tough. You've got a whole family full of opinions, different political views, and backgrounds — not to mention, no family gets along perfectly. We've all got a reborn Christian aunt who likes telling you about the joys of marriage, or an uncle who's constantly saying inappropriate things or calling our government a lie. This year, it goes without saying that the holidays are bound to be particularly intense, since every day presents something new we have to worry about in the news cycle. One thing you can be certain about is that you can disarm any hostile holiday dinner situation by putting your Pisces personality traits to good use by making it all about you.

For instance, the next time the volume is raised on political discussion over a fried turkey dinner, you can yell out "I'm a Pisces, which means I'm an empath, and this is all too much for me!" Not only will it kill the conversation or argument by completely throwing everyone off, but it will bring the attention back to what's important right now: you and your constitutional inability to face conflict head on. Maybe your Uncle Rob's heart is made of stone, but you are a Pisces, and your heart is made of down feather pillows and cotton candy.

Here are some Pisces personality traits to let your family know about before the next holiday meal you share.

1. Empathy

Next time your mom wants to bring up how your sister isn't married yet, and you see your sister's eye start to twitch (the way it does before she cries in public), remind everyone at the table that you're a Pisces, and when other people cry, you do too. You're an empath after all, and your mom should really be considering the fact that she's not hurting one daughter — she's actually hurting two.

Maybe now she'll think twice: once for your unlovable sister who nobody wants to marry, and a second time for her sensitive little Pisces, who is too pure for this world!

2. Selflessness

This holiday, remind your diabetic family to save you a little of the gravy you make every year. You've heard it's the best gravy ever made by anyone, but you wouldn't really know, because you've never tried it. So when you see your cousin Ben, your granddad, and your sister-in -law reaching for the last drop in the gravy boat, go ahead and speak up for yourself.

Try saying something like, "Pisces are known for giving without expecting anything in return, just like Jesus was, but if it's alright, I'd really like to taste one drop of the miracle gravy you disgusting pigs have kept me from for my entire adult life."

That way, you can stop surviving on only the holiday joy surrounding you and start filling up on actual food.

3. Martyrdom

Always remember that if all else fails and no one will #STFU about who so-and-so voted for or whether or not Trump will win the election in 2020; if Uncle Vin won't stop dogging your Aunt Vickie about how much parsley she used in her casserole; if mom and dad won't quit bickering about who made the wrong choice with the tablecloth they chose — you are a Pisces and you can cry on command better than any Oscar-winning actress alive (or dead, obviously.)

There is not one quality any Pisces has more than their ability to make other people's failures about them. Use your uncanny ability to blame yourself for your family's problems to your advantage, turn on the waterworks, and flood the room with your tears. Nobody can scream about potatoes when they're busy trying to fix the busted pipes that are your tear ducts.

Maybe now everyone will think again before rocking the boat around a water sign.