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This Wearable Baby Flask Will Help You Look Like A Sober Idiot

by Gillian Fuller

Discreet day drinking just got a whole lot easier thanks to Simon Philion, inventor of the Cool Baby.

The aptly-named flask, as Philion writes on the product's Kickstarter page, is described as “an expressive, customizable, hands-free beverage insulator that looks like a baby.”

Essentially an oversized thermos, the Cool Baby is approximately the size of an actual baby and looks like a doll, although the manufacturer encourages customers to “dress it up to look like you, use it to get a seat on the subway, strike up a conversation or mock a biological baby.”

While onlookers are sure to realize the PVC construction is, in fact, inanimate, the Cool Baby still serves its alcohol-disguising purposes (you just might look a little crazy as an adult carrying around a rubber doll.)

Remove the 36-ounce bladder and fill it up with the juice of your choice, then insert it back inside the doll's hollow cavity (via a removable butt).

The mouthpiece hides inside the baby's head, which is covered with a baby-sized beanie for maximum camouflage.

Currently, Philion is seeking fundraising via Kickstarter to make his baby thermos a reality. So far, $13,243 of his $70,000 goal has been raised.

Backers have six more days to pledge, with rewards ranging from a digital high five for a $1 donation, to a gift of 10 lifelike Cool Babies modeled after the backer's own appearance (as well as credit as a producer) for donations of $8,000 or more.

If fully funded, the Cool Babies will be available in a range of “baby races, baby dispositions, baby sexual orientations and baby IQs,” as described by Philion.

Interested? Donate here.

Citations: Heres a Fake Baby You Can Fill With Booze To Drink In Public (Uproxx)