Whining Has Never Solved Anything: If You're Not Going To Change, Stop Complaining

by Paul Hudson

A new year usually brings a new resolution to add to all the other resolutions you failed to follow through with. Maybe this year's resolution is exactly the same as last year’s and maybe even identical to the resolution of the year before that. Generation-Y is a generation of talkers. We talk smack. We text, tweet and post all day. We troll, we insult and we threaten.

We run our mouths so often and talk about how great we are to the point that others are on the verge of sickness. Then, the most amazing thing happens: absolutely nothing. We talk a great game, but are unable to follow through. We believe that we can do this and that and anything we set our minds to, which is as near the truth as possible. Yet, we never get about to doing any of it. We are lazy assh*les and we know it.

If you’re going to be a lazy assh*le, go ahead and be a lazy assh*le -- it’s your American right to do so. You have one life to live and you are welcome to living the sh*ttiest life you wish to live; no one can stop you. If you want to do nothing with yourself, you can choose not to. But please, for the love of God and all other deities, don’t complain about the results that ensue.

You are the one that chose to live life in such a manner. You are the one that chose inaction. You are the one who talked a big game and is now making lame excuses as to why the world has suppressed your natural talents and why circumstances have made it “impossible” for you to achieve anything. You have chosen to be as you are. You’ve made your bed; now sleep in it.

It’s easy enough to understand why we complain. It’s a means of reassigning the blame to something or someone other than ourselves; it’s a way for us to point our fingers and renounce the part we played in the results we are now reaping, or lack thereof. In addition, it allows us to get worked up and release some of that frustration that has built up over the course of our failures. You see, what few people seem to understand is that failing doesn’t require "trying" to succeed. Failure doesn’t necessarily require physical action.

The lack of movement and change, aka inaction, results in failure just the same. Failure isn’t just doing and not achieving, it’s also wanting but never having the courage or strength to give it a try in the first place. Failing to take action and to start the changing process is even worse than attempting but not finishing. Now you’re not just a lazy ass, but a cowardly, lazy ass. To top it all off, you’re sure to complain about your situation over and over and over again until your friends are sick of hearing your yammering.

We all have that friend that just sits and complains about how sh*tty his or her life is -- hell, we may very well be that friend. This friend complains about his or her weight, how boring life is, how much he or she hates working, how much he or she hates not having someone to come home to and how much his or her life generally sucks.

Then, this person proceeds to do absolutely nothing about it -- literally nothing. This person will do nothing more than make a verbal commitment that he or she will incite change, or maybe even a New Year's resolution if timing is right. Nonetheless, this person does nothing to change his or her given situation. He or she has decided to accept defeat, with no "energy" to do it. His or her situation makes it "impossible" to complete anything worthwhile. This person doesn’t have the time, the money or the knowledge.

All I can say to you is that all the things you are complaining about as the sources of your woes are entirely and completely in your control. If you haven’t figured out a way to do it, you are not being creative enough. If you know what needs to be done, but are too lazy to get yourself to do it, then you are the sole reason for your failures.

If you want to remain a failure, feel free to do so, but don’t complain about it. It’s not your right to complain about it -- in fact, it’s everyone else’s right not to have to listen to the bullsh*t you spew to everyone else, which only you are eating up by the spoonful. The decisions you make are your own. There is always a way out of a messy, depressing or suppressive situation -- always. It may not be easy, it may not be an overnight fix, and it may not be ideal, but it is a way.

There is ALWAYS a way. You have to be smart, intuitive, receptive to change and as adaptive as possible. You have to outsmart people, avoid the nasty situations that can be avoided and navigate through those that can’t. You have to be willing to change, excited to make those changes and prepared to see them through. Most importantly, you cannot allow yourself to complain. Complaining is just a form of self-pity; it’s pretending that your life is not in your control and that you aren't responsible your troubles.

You are just as strong as you exhibit; you are capable of amazing things. But you're also being lazy and being stupid. It happens to the best of us, but if you want something, you have to go get it. You’re the only person standing in your way.

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