We all have that one friend or know of a group of people who are just shallow and easily impressed by the stupidest things. Some of these people seek pleasure in material goods and being seen in a 'cool' environment. These people will do anything to achieve a high social status; they are known as social climbers. Social climbers are selfish people who only look out for their own interests usually including looking and feeling as if they are part of the 'in' crowd.
You will see these people go to extreme lengths just to fit in. Many of them are untrustworthy as they will be quick to leave your side if they see a better social opportunity for themselves. It's hard to get into deep conversation with these people as they only know about superficial things that don't really matter.
It is easy to spot a social climber as they are the ones trying the hardest just to fit in. They go to unnecessary lengths to seem as if they are cool. Many of these people are just lame posers. Here are the signs that you are a social climber:
You're just as thirsty for a celebrity retweet as you are for promoter champagne.
Social media sites are a den for social climbers. Everyone wants to be cool and everyone wants to be noticed, but some people take this to an extreme. If you are tweeting at celebrities on a consistent basis then you, my friend, are a social climber. You are wasting your time trying to get their attention in order to get a retweet so your friends can think highly of you.
You're no longer in third grade and it's time to grow up. No one cares about a celebrity retweet anyway -- except for other social climbers. Stop flooding their twitters with your unnecessary tweets for attention, it's not a good look and it's quite annoying.
You're overly concerned with the way you dress and people's perception of what you wear.
Unless you're going to fashion school, there is no reason you should be dressing to fit in. If you are an individual that goes to great lengths to look like you belong with the people you hang out with, then you are doing way too much. There is no need for you to do things that you do not like.
If you don't fit in with a certain crowd it's not the end of the world. People will relate to you more if you have similarities aside from clothes. Social climbers usually flaunt designer labels and other attention drawing accessories in order to seek approval from those around them. So if you notice yourself doing this, then know you are a social climber.
You know the right name to drop at every club and at what time.
It's a week night but that doesn't deter you from going out. You know all the promoters and know which clubs they will be working at. Not only do you know what club they are working at, but you have the exact time they will be there. This is not only a sign that you are extremely thirsty, but it shows that you have no life.
Going out once in a while for a few drinks is fine, but going out every night just so you can been seen is an easy way of proving that you are a social climber. At the end of the day, you really don't end up enjoying yourself, you just keep following promoters hoping to be seen having a good time by others.
You persistently flake on events to go out to events that are of better status.
Flaking has become a way of life. If you are not able to make it to an event because an emergency or you realized you had something to do last minute, then by no means are we talking to you. However if you are one of those people who constantly promises your friends that you will be going out with them, yet at the last minute decide to change your plans to go to an event of a higher status consistently, then you are a social climber.
What's wrong with just having a chill night with friends? If you are a social climber, you are constantly on the prowl to be seen and want to be with people who will make you look better. If flaking is a habit, then you need not say more, as it is evident that you are here in this world for one reason and one reason only -- to solidify yourself in the douche social seen full of fake intellectuals.
You RSVPed for a draft party.
Nothing screams social climber like someone who RSVPs to draft parties. The only rare situation that you should ever attend a draft party is if one of your friends actually got drafted. Other than that, there is no reason for you to attend these type of parties unless you are a social climber. Social climbers love these type of events, as it will give them the best opportunity to meet a professional athlete.
Veteran social climbers are consistently seen at draft parties, since they are seasoned in the field of social climbing, they know how to choose their young prey properly. So next time you find yourself about to RSVP to a draft party, think about it before you say yes.
You get excited for fashion week.
There are few things more annoying than fashion week, unless you're a social climber. Fashion week is full of individuals who somehow feel it's appropriate to share their fashion advice as if they are all stylists. Just because you are from New Jersey and wear Tory Birch does not mean you should be commentating about fashion as if you are Anna Wintour. Honestly no one cares about your sh*tty blog or how many fashion events you want to go to.
Fashion week is like the Olympics for social climbers. The goal for them is to go to as many events as possible and take as many photos as they can in order to make their friends jealous. Don't be one of these people, if you're going to go to an event during fashion week, act like you've been there before and do it for your own personal enjoyment, not to take thousands of photos and show off your presence at the event.
You drink bottles at a promoter's table on a consistent basis.
If you're in a club and sitting at a table drinking house vodka, you are not VIP, you're just good at social climbing. There is nothing more pathetic than people who drink promoter vodka, yet take countless photos of bottles at their table as if they really paid for it. Just quit while you're ahead, enjoy the free alcohol and chill.
There is no need to Instagram photos with free bottles just to seem cool. Gullible people may fall for your stupidity, but in the end you will get exposed when people actually see you at the promoter table.
You try to get into the DJ booth, period.
No one should ever try to get into the DJ booth of a club unless you are the club owner, fixing a sound issue or an actual friend or family member of the DJ. If you do not fit into this category, yet you find yourself taking photos from the DJ booth, then it should be no surprise to you that you are a social climber.
There is no need for you to pretend as if you know the DJ because frankly he's just trying to get his dick wet. So if you find yourself lying, cheating and clawing your way to the DJ booth, at least make it worth his while and give him a quick blowjob during his set. Then and only then may he consider playing the song you've been requesting for the past four hours.
You take IG photos and tag the location so others can see where you are.
It's one thing to tag your Instagram photos in exotic locations during your travels; however, if most of your photos have clubs and restaurants as your location, then you're trying too hard.
Nothing is worst than having your IG feed flooded by someone who constantly takes photos of their food and kissy face selfies at clubs. Great, we get it, you go out and you like to eat dinner at fancy places; now stop taking photos as it is blowing up my newsfeed.
You go to the Hamptons on long weekends.