Going topless is one thing; going full-on commando is quite another.
As a woman who considers herself pretty wild and free, I jumped at the opportunity to throw caution to the Jamaican wind, and set sail for four days of uninhibited, purely pleasurable fun.
It was not just a gift of sexual freedom and self-expression.
Here are seven things I learned during an adults-only, clothing-optional vacation... AKA at a naked resort.
1. I met people of all types, backgrounds, and lifestyles.
The whole idea behind the resort I went to was it welcomes all kinds of guests, but especially caters to those who live the "lifestyle" (aka swingers).
People are offered a space to be who they really are. So it was a secluded sanctuary of sorts.
I met people of all types: groups of couples who had been married many years who look forward to this trip year after year with like-minded friends, single folks looking to explore a little (or a lot), and couples looking to rekindle the romance between just the two of them.
2. I saw more waxed snatches and D's than I thought I would.
The '70s are out, and totally bald pussies and penises are in.
I'll admit I hadn't expected to see any real bushes (we are talking about a clothing-optional resort, after all), but I did expect to see at least some hair down there. Pretty much everyone at the resort was basically pubic hair-free, even the woman who was over 50 and had a pierced vag.
3. Swimming butt-ass naked in the warm Jamaican water is good for the soul.
I hopped into the water: flippers, snorkel, and all (and by "all," I mean hair tie and earrings).
The warm waters shimmied around every crevice of my body. It was an experience that not only freed me literally, but also freed my soul and reminded me of my power as a woman, and of nature's power, too.
These visits went far beyond your typical late night, skinny-dipping romps and forged bonding on a deeper level.
4. I could do as much, or as little, as I wanted.
It's no surprise that guests at a clothing-optional resort are inundated with propositions and opportunities to fly their freak flags.
I went on a naked snorkel sesh, and then I ventured to the Nude Beach. With just a little bit of liquid courage, I was reveling in it all.
It's like drinking alcohol or smoking weed: as soon as it becomes legal, it feels like less of a big deal, and there's no stigma attached to it.
Well, the same could be said for coexisting with a bunch of nudists. Walking around naked eventually didn't seem like such a big deal, because everyone else was doing the same.
5. Open doors mean everyone is welcome.
I quickly learned of the resort's rules, both written and unspoken.
One of these "rules" says that, if a hotel room's door is left open, that means another individual or couple is welcome to go inside. What happens after that, I'm not so sure.
6. I saw things I wasn't expecting.
It took all of about 30 minutes at the resort for me to realize that anything goes, anytime of the day.
When I first stepped onto the property, I wasn't too keen on getting right to the beach, as my fatigue from a long morning of travel was about to get the best of me.
So, to feel a little less tired, I went to the gym. The gym, by the way, has a mandatory clothing policy, thank God.
Upon strolling out of the gym, my eyes were met with a couple going at it on a daybed. They were trying to be discreet about it, but still... it was happening.
Maybe I was just caught off-guard since we were in such different frames of mind at that moment: I was fully clothed, sweaty, and wearing running shoes; they were displaying body parts where the sun doesn't (usually) shine.
7. I felt more sexually charged throughout the day than I do in RL.
From Nude Beach to random daytime activities (having my tits decorating with cake toppings, anyone?), and multiple porn channels in my bedroom, there was no shortage of stimulus for my sexual fantasies.
Complete with mirrors on the guest room ceilings, a playroom with purple velvet walls, sex swings, a stall shower, and a sign that read, "No tits, no ass, no service" at the pool bar, this place had it all.