The Sh*t White Bitches Love Volume II
While many of these things can be applied to anyone and everyone, here we are going to focus on the sh*t white bitches like. So get the stick out yo ass and learn to laugh with the rest of us. Remember the people who get offended are typically the ones who are guilty of such things. And if you fit the description, learn to laugh along with the rest of us. Life is too short to be uptight.
Moving on, let's take a look at some more sh*t white bitches are notorious for:
Instagram Filters
“OMG do you like this one or this one? Wait! What about this one?” Bitches love Instagram filters because they allow them to photoshop themselves to look as good as possible, “Ugh, Julie does this Mayfair filter make us look tan? Or should we stick to Rise?”
Blowing Shit Out of Proportion
Hell hath no fury like a white woman scorned, isn’t that the saying? No one likes to make a bigger deal out of absolutely nothing than white bitches. Difficult breakups? Disagreements with friends? Going out in the rain? Chances are it's white women who are complaining about this shit. There are drama queens all around us and we know exactly who those perpetrators usually are.
Soul Cycle
There is nothing a white chick likes more than going along with the latest trend. Soul Cycle is a girl’s go-to exercise class in NYC and other major cities. For one, it is a place to see and be seen. Secondly, it gives them an excuse to wear an entire Lululemon outfit. Who else would be willing to drop $40+ on an exercise class besides white bitches? These girls swear by it and claim, “it’s a way of life.”
Michael Kors/Tory Burch
The go-to brands for white women around the country. Chances are you could throw a pebble in a crowd and you will more than likely hit someone rocking on of these brands. Don’t even try to argue this one.
All Things Diet
Diet coke, diet Snapple, diet pills: anything that has the word diet in it, chances are white biddies love it. Women are constantly concerned with their weight, that is not to be debated, so of course they love their diet products.
“This Is Gross, Do You Want Some?”
We are all guilty of this, but for some reason we think that if we eat or smell something disgusting, we need to share this with our friends. If something were gross, why would I want to take part in it? You already did me the favor of testing it out so I don’t have to. Keep that ish to yourself, thank you very much.
Birthdays
No one celebrates a birthday quite like a white woman. This is a time for the attention to be solely on them. Picstitch tributes galore! These biddies thrive on this shit. I understand an elaborate celebration if you are turning 18 or 21, but when you are only turning 23 -- what the f you got to celebrate?
Studying Abroad
Ain’t nothing more fun for white bitches to do than studying abroad in college. This gives them an excuse to get white girl wasted in endless amounts of cities — all the while on their parents' dime. You can find these girls sipping on sangria on the beds of CDLC or running down the beaches of Barcelona blacked out searching for the closest Kyke* they can get their hands on. (*Not the derogatory term you probably think it is, but the name of two famous club promoters*)
Beach Houses
Whether this is down the shore (OMG DTS FOR MDW W/ MAH GIRLS), the Hamptons, or AC -- white biddies love their summer beach houses. Whether they rent the houses for the summer with their friends or it’s their parents' home, they attempt to outrun the summer heat of NYC by taking shelter at these beach homes.
The Elliptical
Girls hate sweating, but love cardio -- ergo the Elliptical. No one rocks the elliptical quite like a white girl does. They can literally spend hours on that thing, I see it everyday. Don’t believe me? Hit up your local Equinox or Crunch and try to tell me otherwise.
Hoodies
White bitches love to be comfortable and nothing screams comfort as much as a hoodie. The best hoodies are not even our own, but those of our guy friends. The bigger the sweatshirt, the more comfy it is. Sorry boys, but it’s your own fault if you think you are ever going to get back that sweatshirt you lent your girl friends.
