This Nature Mockumentary About 'Peacocks' Is All You Need To See Today

In my seven years working in fashion, I have seen a lot of weird shit. I'd list them all here, but I don't want lawyers coming after me with pitchforks and torches.

The weirdest, by far, has been Fashion Week. It's like everyone dresses like a jackass for a month's worth of shows (all of which start late, none of which last more than 10 minutes), then people go back into their hole and disappear off the face of the earth for six months until next time.

My favorite part wasn't watching chicks in tottering heels or editors turning up their noses at “influencers” -- it was watching the dudes. And holy shit, are fashion dudes hilarious.

This year for Pitti Uomo, which is sort of like a biannual tradeshow for men's fashion that takes place in Florence, the dudes really turned up. And by turned up, I mean they were a level all of their own.

Like, isn't it hot in Florence? Why is everyone wearing a suit? Am I missing something? If fashion calls for sweating to death in a three-piece, I want to stay as far away from it as I can.

Director Aaron Christian decided that the best way to celebrate the great men of Pitti Uomo wasn't to join them. Rather, it was to make them unwittingly star in a nature documentary. Because, well, duh.

In case you're unfamiliar, Urban Dictionary defines peacocking as "dressing for attention." In these men's case, it would be for the attention of photographers.

They're not the ones to pioneer the idea, though. In fact, athletes have been doing it for forever.

Like Dwyane Wade, for example.

Or Russell Westbrook.

But none can hold a candle to the guys in this mockumentary:

"Nature's most extravagant narcissist -- the peacock."

All peacocks have one goal: mating...

...with a photographer. By taking a photo. Get your mind outta the gutter.

Hipster Abe Lincoln is kind of a babe, TBH.

So is hipster Teddy Roosevelt.

Guess Gatsby's back?

If you couldn't tell, they're REALLY feelin' themselves.

OK, but can someone get me Teddy Roosevelt's number real quick?

Citations: The Life Of Pitti Peacocks - Pitti Uomo Mockumentary (YouTube)