The biggest mistake we all make is forgetting about ourselves. We manage to get caught up in all the drama, politics and nonsense of life and we forget where our true focus should actually lie. Let's be honest, we become distracted at the drop of a dime with our ADD issues and procrastination problems.
The real issue is these small distractions manage to get bigger and bigger and, in the process, we lose ourselves and what we really want out of life. You should be a little selfish. The truth is no one is really going to care about you but yourself.
They might smile in your face, take shots with you and pretend to be your best friend, but when you need them most and you are struggling in life, you will soon realize that the only person you have there to help you is yourself. If you recall in the movie “A Bronx Tale” when Sonny explained to his protege that Mickey Mantle doesn't care about him so why the hell should he care about Mickey Mantle. After that day the kid could care less about Mickey Mantle.
And that's the same way you should go about dealing with others in your life. Of course we all have friends, associates, colleagues and other people with whom we interact, but there is one thing that you must understand about all of them.
People have their own needs and wants -- and those needs and wants might actually never intersect with your needs and wants, which means they are going to be looking out for themselves when their opportunity arises. Don't be caught up in all the bullshit.
Life is all about the energy and attitude you possess. When you are getting yourself stuck in pointless drama or politics, you are sucking all of the positive energy from yourself and letting it fester into negativity. It's funny because people will always say they have to deal with some sort of bullshit -- and the keyword is “need.”
They are forcing themselves to do so, so that they can keep in good graces with the people around them. You technically don't need to do anything if you don't want to and I believe too many people in our world have forgotten that.
They force themselves into situations and into doing things just because they are insecure and don't like to be alone or left out, but by doing so they are losing themselves in the process. By worrying about other people, we tend to make their problems, our problems.
We constantly compare ourselves to other people who appear to be doing great because we are insecure -- yet that only makes us feel worse about ourselves and discourages us. Someone's life might seem fantastic and their Instagram might be straight flexing, but I assure you upon a closer look, their life is just as f*cked up as yours with just as many problems.
We have all turned into gossiping idiots and our mouths have become individual tabloids. We talk more shit than we eat. We love making up rumors, spreading juicy stories about people we know and taking situations and blowing them up so that everyone we possibly know can find out about it. Instead of focusing on ourselves, bettering ourselves and growing in life, we put our time and energy into other people, which yields no value, but feeds our stupid little insecure minds.
What I am asking you today is to be beyond all of that. You have a long way to go in life. Between finding yourself and finding your purpose, your to do list is as long as the Bible. The last thing you should do is procrastinate with other people's nonsense and get involved in things you shouldn't even be sticking your head in.
But as a generation, we love to procrastinate so most of you won't take my advice. There will, however, be the handful of people that put themselves beyond worrying about other people, who start focusing on themselves and where their lives are going.
What you are forgetting is that you have a finite amount of energy. The amount of energy you expend worrying about others takes away the energy you devote to yourself – and in no way, shape or form helps you do anything but waste your time. And time is working against you.
You should be selfish and you should remove yourself from all the nonsense and drama that may occur in your life. It holds no value and works against you. Stop thinking that you have to do something just to fit in or to be considered in good graces with your friends.
When you stop caring about what other people think and stop giving them your energy, they will actually want you more. But don't fall into their trap, they are just miserable and trying to drag you down. People often base their decisions on what others may think of them, and live their life as others may want them to, but that is just like wearing a mask -- and when you wear a mask for too long you might lose what's underneath it
In short, other people are your worse enemies. Stop depending on them for things and stop trying to worry about them or letting them affect your life. Make decisions based in your best interests, do what you truly want to do and don't ever live a life someone else wants you to live, because there is no happiness in the long term from it. People suck, you rock, care about yourself and do whatever the f*ck you want.
Preston Waters | Elite.