How to Deal With People You Don’t Like

by Ashley Fern

As you go through life, there will be people you don’t get along with, but you must tolerate -- whether it is a co-worker, a boss, teacher or an acquaintance of a friend. Most people have been faced with the awkward situation of dealing with someone that likes them a lot more than they like the other person, in situations like these, it's difficult to know just the right way to behave.

Sometimes we don’t connect the same with certain people as we do with others, and before you can appropriately handle the situation, it is crucial that you recognize that it is okay that you don’t like them. This does not make you a bad person and it doesn’t mean you think they are a bad person either.

When dealing with people, you must always remember that it’s not about changing others, but about changing yourself. The best way to address an undesirable situation is to try and change the way you perceive it and your reaction to it. By changing that, everything else will begin to follow suit.

You need to establish boundaries on what behaviors you will or will not tolerate from other people. By drawing such limitations, you are clearer about the kind of behaviors you expect from others. If you do not do this, it will be easy for you to be pushed over. Many people are unaware of other people’s limits and will force their beliefs on you if you do not stand your ground.

People may not be aware that they are encroaching upon your personal space, so it is essential to let them know where you stand the next time a similar issue arises. If a person does not stay within your boundaries, you need to reinforce them. You need to be vocal in your communications so that your limits may be respected.

Sometimes people just don’t get it. They don’t understand your perspective and after continuously trying, they may still not comprehend. At this point, it may be in your best interest to simply ignore this person. When you respond, you give them a reason to prolong their actions. If you just ignore them, they are left with no other choice but to bother someone else. Also it hints to them tendencies about their own conduct and may help them do some introspection. In certain situations, it is difficult not to take the actions of others too personally.

Watching other people deal with the same annoying person as you, can be an eye-opening experience. Observing situations from a third party’s perspective can give you insight on how best to manage this person. The next time you are with someone that annoys you, try to get someone else involved in the conversation. Bring up a topic that they can engage in while you take a backseat and observe the interaction.

When there is someone in your social circle that you dislike, it is difficult to ignore him or her. This is usually the case of a “friend of a friend.” Just because someone you like enjoys them does not mean that you must. But you do have to be tolerable and not cause friction within the circle. Also, it is best not to talk sh*t about this person to your other friends because it will just make you look like the idiot in the situation.

If you have to see someone you detest on a regular basis, it all boils down to self-discipline. You can’t let anything this person says bother you; always remain the bigger person. If they don’t like you either, that is their own problem, but you don’t want to go out searching for trouble from other people. Always treat them with respect because they will end up treating you the same way. When dealing with people, you “get what you give.” Be nice enough, but not too nice, as to open yourself up to getting pissed off and upset. Never let them know if anything bothers you, just keep living life!

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