We are all guilty of this — of course, some of us more so than others — but regardless, we have all fallen victim to associating with assh*les. Why? Well, there are many reasons we tend to look for hope in the hopeless and they all start and end with ourselves.
Whether it’s a current boyfriend, an intolerable ex-boyfriend or simply, an awful friend you insist on defending, one way or another you are stuck with an assh*le by your own choosing.
Focusing on the “why” is the easiest way to diagnose the issue. When we were young, we were taught to accept everyone, regardless of shape, size or color. We had a resilient attitude when it came to friendships and we always seemed to find the good and disregard the bad in people.
However, we are no longer children and the world’s playground is not so innocent. This idealistic ideology is no longer compatible with reality. Those children we once knew have been shaped into adults we may or may not recognize. While we want to be extremely accepting, we must realize that not every person has the best intentions.
Another reason we tend to deal with assh*les is because we simply don’t want to believe we were wrong. We don’t want to give up on the person because it will solidify evidence that all the time and effort spent was a waste.
This can be particularly difficult if you had been friends with someone since your childhood or if you had been dating for years. It’s always difficult to throw in the towel and admit defeat, even if it’s for the best.
But even though losing these people may be tough, keeping them in your life is even tougher. Consistently surrounding yourself with negativity doesn’t help them to become any more positive.
All that is gained by investing in these types of people is lost time — you are simply trying to deny the inevitable. It’s great that you wished more for this person, but just because he or she didn’t live up to your expectations doesn’t mean you’re at fault.
Sometimes, we stay by a person’s side in hopes of finding a glimpse of the person we know he or she can become. But holding on to someone so awful only makes it more difficult for you to grow and become a more defined individual.
Why waste another moment associating with someone who isn’t worth it? Nothing good can come from investing in bad people.
Top Photo Courtesy: Screened