The older I get, the more I realize my mom really knows her sh*t.
Not just my mom, basically all mothers have this weird, collective intuition that lets them know when their kids are bound to f*ck up.
Mothers also posses this amazing superpower that allows them to still love, protect, cherish and empathize with their children, even after they make wrong choices and decisions. Thank god for that.
Moms are usually right in what they say regarding nearly 99.9 percent of all of your life situations.
Not because it's just some weird "mothering" thing, but because they honestly and truly love and want the best for their children.
Looking back, I realize I could have avoided tons of heartbreak had I listened to my mother.
In my 25 years of life on this earth, here are the times I honestly wish I just listened to my mom the start.
…Doing so sure would have made my life a lot easier:
1. Don’t date bad boys; they only turn into bad men
Yeah, this is a big one. Not just for me, but it seems like my inner circle of friends (when we were younger) just loved to date people who treated us like crud.
Ladies, honestly, there is nothing attractive about bad boys. Just because he has a motorcycle and a criminal record, doesn’t give you an open invitation to try to “change” him.
I understand our weird brains view this as a challenge, and we all want to be that girl they change for, but it will never happen.
Unless they are carbon copies of James Dean, circa “Rebel Without a Cause,” leave 'em alone.
(Even then, you’re still not Natalie Wood.) Trust me on this.
2. Take school seriously
Ugh, if I had a dollar for every single time I heard this.
I was always a good student and then I had a taste of freedom in college and went wild. I breezed through semesters and didn’t give grad school — or even graduation — a second thought.
I thought even less about how I would support my future family because, of course, according to 18-year-old me, I was “never, ever having children.”
Yeah, look at me now; I just recently sold a mini van at 24. Honestly, get an education. I finished up a lab assistant program with a baby, and it was hard.
I plan on going back — some day —, but I know it will be even more challenging with two.
Finish up before you have kids and make it easier on yourself; any mom in school with kids will corroborate that advice.
3. Stop letting people use you
This includes friends, boyfriends and family members. If someone only comes around when it benefits him or her, go ahead and cut him or her out of your life.
These people aren't your friends. These relationships usually turn toxic and end badly.
4. Cherish your true friends, and be there for them
I have a group of girlfriends I adore, and even though we may not see each other as much as we’d like, when we do get together, it is like time never passed.
People grow up, have their own lives and move away, but the bond of true friendship can withstand numerous miles and missed phone calls.
You all know who you are and you know that through thick and thin, I will always be there for you guys.
5. Never settle
Everyone deserves to be happy. Everyone deserves the best. It doesn’t matter if it is a relationship or a job.
Do not settle for something that is mediocre when you could find something that is perfect.
It took me a long time to quit settling, but once I did, my entire life changed and for the better.
And then, there was one piece of advice I did take:
My mom encouraged me to marry someone who made me a better person. I was going through an extremely turbulent time in my life and was not in a good place spiritually, emotionally or physically.
I broke off an engagement I knew wasn’t right. Mom knew it too, but never said it.
Instead, she let me make my own choices and had enough faith in me to know I would make the right one.
It was one of the best decisions to date I have ever made for myself and I am sure he feels the same way. Mom assured me that when I found the one, I’d know.
Four years and two kids later, I'm happy to say, she was right. I found him.
The moral of the story is, your mama knows what she is talking about. If I have any young readers out there, take it from the queen of defiance and stupid choices: listen to her.
She knows you better than anyone, and is willing to put up with all of your sh*t and still love you.
If she tells you not to do something, leave it at that and just don’t do it. Don’t be like me, looking back and cringing at all the idiotic things you did in the past.
Hopefully I can offer the same insight to my sons although, if they are anything like me, they probably won’t listen.
One last thing: If your mom tells you that lime green, sequined prom dress you'd die for is ugly, chances are it probably is.