You're Not Anti-Social, You're Secure: Why It's Cool To Be A Homebody

by Marisa Strauss

There was once a point in all of our lives when the idea of staying home on a Friday, Saturday or even a Thursday night seemed out of the question. The FOMO (fear of missing out) we would feel if we didn't go to a party or event would be off the charts.

Not to mention, we'd be constantly reminded of all the "fun" we weren't having via Snapchat.

But, now, as our college years start to fall or have fallen behind us, and life starts getting more serious, the prospect of FOMO has started to fade. FOMO has stopped being a real thing and, instead, become a laughable part of our past.

The amount of social pain I once felt if I missed a party could almost bring me to tears back in the day. Would people notice if I wasn't there? Would people think I wasn't fun? Those were just a few of the questions I considered.

I'm not sure where or when it happened, but one day, I stopped caring about how many shots I could take or how many parties I could fit into one weekend. That's when my friends started teasing me, saying, "You never go out anymore," or "You're no fun, why are you always home?"

These were the comments thrown at me every time I turned down an invitation to "get wasted." It made me wonder if something really was wrong with me: Was I anti-social? Is this not normal for a 20-something? Am I boring?

It took some time to process what was going on, and I came to the conclusion that there's nothing wrong with you or me. There are plenty of other exciting things life has to offer outside of binge-drinking on the weekends. So, no, it doesn't make me or anyone else boring for passing that up.

What once was something I never thought I could live without, I grew completely tired and bored of. I had lost interest in making out with strangers, waking up with horrible hangovers and wasting away beautiful days.

It was the same routine, and going out was never new. Sure, sometimes I'd meet interesting people, but rarely. Most of the time it was the same.

You pregame, you call a cab, you drink more, you dance, you come home, you pass out, repeat. I was at a point where I now wanted to be home with my family or a few good friends, instead.

I prefer staying home because I've gotten my fill of the bar scene. There is nothing left for me there. Sure, I can enjoy an occasional night out, but I'd much rather crawl into my favorite sweats, cuddle up to my best friends and watch a movie, any night of the week.

The conversations you have with people who love you are more meaningful and wise than any advice some drunk stranger can offer at the bar. I just wish I realized it sooner.

People often ask me, "Doesn't it bother you to be home alone while everyone else is out?" If you asked me a few years ago, I wouldn't be able to answer you -- I'd already be out. My answer now would be something like, "Absolutely not."

I cherish my alone time. Being alone is one of the most beautiful things you can give yourself; you can be selfish and do anything you want on your terms.

I've been made to feel that being a homebody is a shameful thing, but it's amazing, and quite frankly, I think a lot of people are missing out.

Being a homebody means you're comfortable enough being alone that you consistently seek it out just to get some quality time with your favorite person: yourself.

If anyone is giving you grief for staying at home on a Friday night, chances are, he or she is in some dire need of alone time.

Everyone will get there, just on their own terms. You are certainly not boring, you just know what you want; don't let anyone make you feel otherwise.

Finding comfort in being alone is something that takes time, but happens for everyone at different stages. What most people don't realize at a young age is that all we have in the end is our memories, and I now choose to make mine with pizza, wine, close friends and family.