As Father’s Day approaches, I can’t help but sit and reminisce. I think back to when I could hear his voice booming from the shower, the ridiculous red Mustang he loved to drive, his endearing infatuation with Eminem’s "8 Mile" soundtrack and the bowls upon bowls of Breyer’s chocolate ice cream we would share at night. All of
All of these memories are staples of my childhood. I think about the moments he has missed in these last five years, moments that would have — I hope — made him proud of the woman he helped to raise.
It is these weeks around Father’s Day that just make me wish for one more minute — 60 more seconds — to soak him all up in my mind. Lucky for me, though, I still have you.
You would have loved my father. He had this personality that would have made you smile the entire time he was speaking.
You'd be mesmerized by him and the way he wove his words into the most amazing stories.
He was the type of man other men looked to for advice, women found comfort in and children absolutely adored.
He embodied the definitions of humor, kindness, love, loyalty, whimsy and strength.
He was a man who had an ability to be loved by everyone and love them all back.
I know you would have loved him because I see him so clearly in you.
I see him in you when you sing along to the radio in the car, in your sarcasm, in your moments of unbelievable ambition, in your ability to listen patiently to all of my crazy dreams, in the ridiculous dad jokes and in your bad dancing. I see him in our quiet moments, too.
I see him in you when I am just seeking comfort, with your arm around my shoulders that lets me know despite the drama, hard times and tears, you are here to stay.
Through you all, I see him. You all stepped in, unknowingly, and have become cheerleaders, listeners, shoulders to cry on, the arms for the biggest hugs and the reasons for some of my biggest smiles.
When I am with you, I get to hold on to all of the qualities I loved in him. My men help me to still feel like Father's Day is a day I can celebrate with more fondness than sadness.
Know how much I value you for being by my side in these weeks when it might not have been the easiest place to be.
I know this is hard to deal with from the outside, and I know I might take it out on you too much.
I know I am not easy to understand right now and that my waters are difficult to tread.
But do understand this: I adore you for just trying and appreciate you more than you know.
In a time when I can’t help but remember a man who left my life, it restores my faith to know that I have ones who choose to stay.
Jared Kushner seems to say it best:
So, thank you for being my rocks, my brothers and my closest friends. Thank you for making me feel like I can celebrate Father’s Day since, in little and wonderful ways, he was so very much like you.