When you finally trade in your sweats for an LBD and make your way out of the apartment, you never leave for the night without one major accessory: your wing woman — more commonly known as your best friend.
Just like guys suit up their wingmen to help them score anything resembling a chick to take home, your wing woman is there to guide you through the drunken haze on which men you find acceptable to strike up a conversation with.
With the two of you being so close already, the position of wing woman becomes second nature. But, what automatically designates your best friend as your wing woman?
Aside from the fact that you're single, shaved your legs and are ready to mingle, your best friend and you are not only sisters, but also have your routine down when you enter any bar or club.
She knows your likes and dislikes when it comes to alcohol, men and bar locations.
Here's why your best friend is the best wing woman you'll ever have:
She knows the type of men you like.
Without saying a word, you know your best friend has spotted one of the hottest guys in the bar for you. She goes into full-on eagle eye status (sans screeching).
You easily recognize the look; you see her eyes widen and the not-so-suave nod toward Mr. Handsome who walked in behind you. Look at you, smooth operators.
Your wing woman knows the kind of men who tickle your fancy and doesn't suggest anything less.
There's a guy who's over 6'2'' AND has a man bun? Don't worry, she's already spotted him and has a plan in action.
The best part? She isn't trying to climb this guy, so there is no competition here. Instead, she finds a way to strike up the perfect opener to introduce the two of you.
She will always save you from the creeps.
There are always different variations of your typical bar creep: the watcher, the I-bought-you-a-beer-and-now-won't-leave, Mr. Fedora, etc.
Navigating your way through these waters can be a bit challenging if you're by yourself. But, with your best bitch by your side, your fear is gone.
Having a guy as your wingman would make things a whole lot easier when warding off the creeps, but you also run the risk of everyone at the bar thinking you two are an item.
Your wing woman will also pretend to be your lesbian lover if some guy doesn't get the hint to take a hike.
They say strength comes in numbers, and in this case, it's incredibly true.
She knows you need three things on your night out: a good flirt, gin and hot dogs from the food cart outside — and you aren't leaving until you get all three.
She will tell you if your lipstick is smudged.
There is no one else in this world who will tell you when you're wearing too much blush, or that those pants really do make your thighs look bigger (besides your mother).
Your wing woman never lets your perfect appearance fade on your night out.
You two know it's hunting season and she has a job to do. She has backup safety pins and extra MAC gloss to save you in your time of need; she's like your own personal stylist.
Like any good wing woman, you two are on the same mission: to find you a man — for the night, a lifetime or until 2 am.
She fills in when your date bails.
Somehow we live in a society where men still stand women up (that's a whole other article. Of course that sucks, but she's there to quickly fill in the missing (ass)hole.
Once you grieve this assh*le's disappearance for a solid 20 seconds, your wing woman shows up to start the night, turning your frown into pursed lips around a pint glass.
Her job is to make sure your hotness and outfit — which you spent two hours deciding upon — aren't wasted.
Her selflessness on your night out is shining bright, making you love her that much more.
She doesn't judge you for having that third (or fourth)
Judgement is something that has no place in the relationship between you and your best friend.
If you're on the prowl for the night, your BFF knows you need a little liquid courage; in fact, she encourages it.
She has shots lined up, and you down 'em faster than a bag of Reese's Pieces. There is no worst case scenario here.
If no men are worthy to be your prey for the evening, you simply have a night out with your best gal pal, getting drunk and being silly together.
If you do hit it off with a guy, you can now get to know each other in the presence of comfortable company. (Just be sure to pop in a mint; no one likes beer breath.)
Your wing woman is also your designated drinking partner, who helps you get the night started. Bad mood? Feeling bloated? Had a rough day at work?
All of the negativity fades away and is replaced with good vibes and inside jokes.
Most importantly, she's your bathroom buddy.
It's an unwritten rule that women must go to the bathroom together, especially in a bar.
How could we possibly miss overhearing drunk conversations or watching a chick put on her romper on backwards?
This small amount of "break time" from the bar is always present at some point in the night.
Sometimes we don't even need to pee, but we go to check out our "on-the-prowl" style.
If you choose a man as your wingman, you can't do this; well you can, but people might stare.
Sex hair? Check. Fly isn't down? Check. Having heart-to-hearts with your wing woman from the toilet? Check, and it's all priceless.