It’s the oldest phrase in the unofficial book of life: People come and go.
Everyone has had his or her fair share of temporary lovers and friends.
These people enter and exit our lives because they were only meant to be in them for specific amounts of time.
But what about the ones who come back and stay?
Sarah was one of my first friends in college.
In fact, we talked on Facebook for months before school started, and we even considered being each others roommates without having met.
Come August, we ended up living across the hall from each other on our freshman floor.
It was as though fate had stepped in and said, “Yes, you guys are meant to be friends.”
We had the same sense of humor and the same need to make everything a grand production.
She was my right hand. My go-to. She was that close college friend you see portrayed in movies.
Fast-forward three months into the semester. We hated each other.
I couldn’t stand to be in the same room as her, and she couldn’t even stand to look at me.
Fast-forward three years. We now have the exact same schedule.
I can’t remember the last time I didn’t run something past her before I did it, or the last time we went a day without sending a few million texts to each other.
Turns out my friendship with Sarah was the type that was meant to be rekindled.
Here are five things I’ve learned from making friends with the enemy:
1. Friendships don’t wake up flawless, either.
When you first become friends with people, you take them at face value for a while. To you, they’re perfect, and you can’t imagine how you were ever not friends with them.
Eventually, this façade fades, and you’re faced with who they really are.
No one and no friendship is perfect, but you have to take it for what it is and make it work for you.
Yeah, you might have a short temper, and your friend might be a little bit of a princess.
But eventually, you learn your friend’s princess tendencies mean she will always know how to make you feel like one, too.
She also learns your short temper will always defend her and help her keep her backbone.
2. Like any relationship, a friendship takes work.
You have to make the effort to be a good person to one another.
That can seem simple, but we’re all a little selfish.
Life’s a crazy ride. It’s easy to get caught up and lose sight of what matters.
3. You're far from perfect.
Who better to help you realize this than the person who — once upon a time — could recite all of your flaws like lines in a play?
She knows why there are people who don't think the sun shines out of your ass.
Sometimes, it’s okay to get kicked off your high horse and be reminded you’re just like everyone else.
She teaches you how to remain grounded, arguably one of the most important lessons of all.
4. It’s not too late to say sorry.
Making mistakes and hurting others is all part of the human experience.
Sometimes, the mistakes are too big to redeem ourselves from, while other times, they’re not.
It really doesn’t matter what the case may be; saying sorry will always help.
If not the situation, it will help heal your mind and soul.
It’s not easy to admit when we’re wrong, but saying sorry could save you a lot of time, resentment and grief.
Swallow your pride and apologize. Odds are, you might come out stronger than before.
For me and Sarah, neither of us was in the wrong, but we’re both flawed. Admitting we both could have done better sufficed.
5. Genuine people are hard to come by.
Chances are, your enemy-turned-friend is one of your favorite people on Earth now. It’s probably because of how genuine and authentic your friendship is.
You guys weren’t shoved in a room and forced to be friends; you chose each other.
You could have avoided the dramatic situation and saved yourself a slew of headaches, but after accepting this person as an extension of yourself, you realized something.
She is truly, authentically and unapologetically herself.
That very well may have been the reason you hated her before, but it’s the reason you love her now.