Happy Snowpocalypse, everyone!
Whether you live in an area that got way less snow than expected or live somewhere that was in the direct line of fire for Mother Nature’s wrath, we’re all still stuck inside.
Everything closed in anticipation of the storm of the century, and so, at least for today (or maybe the next few days), we’re all a little stranded.
Living on the East Coast is such a joy, isn’t it?
There are lots of great things about being stranded. You don’t have to go to work or even leave your house; after all, you physically can’t.
It’s a great excuse to lounge around and do nothing, or do all of those things you’ve been promising yourself you’ll do forever, like clean out your closet, start your memoir, learn to knit, read "Jane Eyre," etc.
Even if the power goes out, you can still read by candlelight or play board games by the fire. Snowpocalypse isn’t so bad if you know how to relax.
However, be warned. Being trapped inside all day can occasionally breed boredom, and boredom is excellent at breeding bad ideas. Even if these decisions seem harmless, remember, you’re trapped.
There are a few activity choices you might want to avoid during this day of being submersed in a winter wonderland.
1. Texting Your Ex
When hanging out around your house with no foreseeable plans, your mind tends to wander.
We have more time to think and dwell on things -- maybe not things, so much as people. We get to thinking about our exes and wondering what they're doing on their snowed-in days. Maybe, we could text them to find out?
Texting your ex isn’t always harmful, but it is when you have nothing else to distract you. If you text someone and he or she doesn’t respond, that’s all you’re going to be thinking about for the rest of the day. Remember, you won’t be able to leave your house to go and find a way to distract yourself.
Texting an ex when you know you have hours ahead of you of not doing much of anything isn’t a good idea. Use this precious down time to relax, not drive yourself crazy.
Before the Snowpocalypse, you were determined to be prepared, right? So you ran to the grocery store and bought batteries, candles, random emergency supplies you’ll probably never use ever, and of course, a sh*t ton of food.
Something about the prospect of being stuck inside for a long period of time seems to make us buy foods we normally might not bring into our homes. Now, there are large bags of sour cream and onion potato chips lying around, and too much time to think about consuming them all.
It’s very easy to binge-eat during a storm or other long staycations. Eating a ton of bad food when you’re stuck inside all day is a poor decision; once you realize how much you just put into your body, you can’t go for a run or head to the gym to make yourself feel better about it.
You’re just left to sit and think about what you’ve done... and eat more to numb the feelings. Eat and be merry during this winter holiday, but don’t overeat and bum yourself out.
Save some junk for another time; it’s bound to snow again before spring, even if we're pretending it won't.
3. Baking Everything
As the news channels droned on about our impending doom regarding Juno, my mom frantically ran about the house trying to prepare, and her biggest concern as she stood outside my room flipping through a cookbook, was what on earth we were going to bake.
When you’re in distress, bake. That seems to be the motto people have stuck in their heads. Whenever we’re at home for a while, baking as many goods as we can with the ingredients we have seems to be the best solution. Baking is a good storm activity, but don’t go overboard.
Remember, the things you bake will stay in your house. They will hang around in the Tupperware or plastic baggies on the counter, and the more you make, the more you will have leftover to consume. If you bake too much, you will either eat them all and hate yourself, or a lot of it will go to waste.
Don’t overdo the baking. There will be plenty of dinner parties you need to make lemon bars for in the future. Save your flour.
4. Picking a Fight
When you’re in one place for a long amount of time, people tend to go a little stir crazy. We’re tired of being stuck inside and maybe a little on edge because of the conditions, so we might be a little testier than usual. Try not to pick a fight with whomever you’re stuck inside with.
Yes, being snowed in can be a pain, but being angry at the people you’re snowed in with isn’t going to melt the snow any faster. Whether it’s your mom, your roommate or your cat, keep it pleasant.
Our houses are only so big, and there are only so many places to escape to if you’re mad at someone. You’re both going to have to end up in the kitchen eventually. Keep the peace. You’ll be free soon.
5. Attempting to Venture Too Far
The longer we’re inside, the more anxious we are to get out. It’s easy to watch the world outside for a while and decide, “Oh, it’s not so bad out there!”
Depending on where you are, maybe it’s not, but it is cold and slippery and white. Still not the most desirable conditions.
Playing outside is one thing, but if you decide to try and venture to the nearest Dunkin' Donuts (which always seem to stay open even during catastrophes), just remember that after making your way there, you will have to make your way back. Uber is snowed in, too.
6. Indulging in Too Many Sad Movies
Provided you have power, binge-watching Netflix or your DVD collection is a fantastic way to pass the time. "Law and Order: SVU" marathon, anyone?
You’ve got lots of time and lots of choices. Anything will do, really; although, you might want to stay away from the super sad romance movies.
"The Notebook" is a beautiful movie, but if it’s going to bring on the tears and make you hate your life when you have no way of leaving the house to shake it off, I’d say you better not. "How I Met Your Mother" is on Netflix. You don’t need "The Notebook."
When you’re stuck inside, it’s natural to wonder how the rest of the region is handling its catastrophic situation.
The news can tell us a lot of what we need to know, but Google knows everything. We head to Google to check out how everyone is fairing, and suddenly, we find ourselves in a Google spiral.
One link leads to another, and before we know it, we’ve read about so many natural disasters, our anxiety levels may never recover.
Google, much like WebMD, is dangerous. When you have nothing to do for hours except lounge around and think, you might want to leave Google alone for a while. Yes, Mom, that means you, too.
8. Do Something Stupid
I know, I know, no one plans to do something stupid (usually), but we’re not typically trying to be dumb. Remember, though, this is a storm. There’s a lot of snow out there, and it might be harder for people to get to you if you burn down the house or sprain an ankle.
Never made a fire before? Let’s hold off on that one. Wanted to use today to learn how to change the light bulb in the highest part of your ceiling using a ladder? Let’s not. Save the daredevil stunts for the weekend. This is Snowpocalypse and the hospital is far.
Hunker down with a blanket and your pug, and let's ride this out. Winter Storm Juno, we got this.