5 Reasons Why Being A Passive-Aggressive Assh*le Gets You Nowhere

by Ryan Nallen

Sometimes, things happen, like people breaking up, friendships dissolving or people just not liking one another.

Regardless of the reason, people react to these situations in a multitude of ways.

One of said ways is passive-aggressive behavior, like using social media to air dirty laundry.

I’ve done it, you’ve done it — but we have to stop doing it.

Rather than going up to someone and having a conversation like we used to, when we were cavemen and cavewomen, we turn to our phones and nonchalantly vent to the world about our issues.

Now, don’t get me wrong; some people need to be put on blast, but if you’re going to do that, do it directly. Don’t beat around the bush.

Say it straight; that’s what you're seething to do, anyway.

Here's why being a passive aggressive assh*le will get you nowhere:

1. It will never bring the anticipated outcome.

There’s a good chance your attempts at communication aren’t even reaching your intended audience.

This person most likely unfollowed you, blocked you or just stopped giving a sh*t entirely, and more than likely it doesn’t faze him or her at all.

The odds are, this person you are trying to reach will not message you and say,

“Hey, I saw you post the lyrics to that Phil Collins song and I was wondering, would you like to get back together?”

This person does not care about your woes and probably didn’t see your posts, anyway.

If you were to look at your own personal dashboard of communication-based statistics, I’m sure you’d see that nine times out of 10, this behavior you’re exhibiting has not proven to be effective.

It didn’t get the person’s attention and if it did, it didn’t end well or in the way you imagined it would.

2. It’s pissing other people off.

The person who you’re trying to reach might not have seen your passive attempts to get his or her attention, but there’s a good chance his or her loved ones have, and that will piss this person off.

Sure, you might have had a bad breakup with a friend or an ex and have something to say, but keep in mind, you current friend roster includes this person's friends and family.

If you’re trying to backdoor market your way back into someone’s life by reaching his or her loved ones, you might be better suited for a job with the mafia.

3. It’s a waste of time.

Honestly, the whole act of vaguely complaining and venting about someone is a waste of time.

If you have a goal to accomplish, it will only happen via face-to-face interactions.

Sitting online all day, looking up lyrics and posting videos or songs to get someone’s attention could be better suited working on what you’d like to accomplish in your life. Use that time for yourself, not someone else.

4. It’s a waste of energy.

Passive-aggressive activity is ugly and soul-sucking. It’s bad mojo and rooted in negativity that isn’t good for anything but making the other person jealous and angry.

It immediately controls your thoughts and hands your reason for doing anything that day over to someone else.

It transforms your goal of the day into an attempt to piss off someone else.

Focus on putting some good vibes into the world rather than spending your time kicking up dirt at the graveyard.

5. It’s showing you still care despite your blatant attempts to appear as if you don’t.

Your “time to move on, taking the garbage out” status or posting the lyrics to "All By Myself" scream, “I’M NOT OVER IT!”

The greatest thing you can do to let someone know you’ve stopped caring is to remove that person from your life, not post pictures and statuses digitally asking him or her to look your way.

Better yet, if this person were meant to be in your life, he or she would be.

You would have managed to work it out, and it wouldn’t have been done via a status, tweet or Pinterest board you dedicated to him or her.

With that, focus on the future and stop living in the past.

While the advent of technology and social media is great, it has also disconnected us from communicating with one another like we are supposed to.

Face-to-face. That's where the breakthroughs, discoveries, confessions and truth is, not behind the guise of an online profile.

Everything happens for a reason and passively aggressively stating your opinion won't get you or the person you’re trying to reach anywhere.

Sh*t happens and sometimes things don’t go the way you want. Hell, the majority of the time, things don’t go the way you want, but that’s life.

You’re better suited to focus all of that energy on your own life and be happy versus trying to get the attention of someone else.

Move on. Live forward.