Why Every College Senior Needs To Remember It's Okay To Feel Lost
We've all faced moments of uncertainty and doubt at one point or another.
For many of you who've clicked this article, you're probably going through that right now.
Although it may feel like it, I can assure you that you aren't the only one who feels lost.
Whenever we're lacking direction, we tend to believe we're the only ones who are struggling.
We look at our friends and peers and have an overwhelming sense of inadequacy and that we're not measuring up to them.
Their futures seem so bright. They seem to have their sh*t together.
You think you're the only one who's messing up.
We forget we don't really know if their lives are as perfect as they appear to be.
Social comparison plays a big factor into how we determine not only our self-worth, but our happiness.
According to psychologists Adam Galinsky and Maurice Schweitzer, social comparison is an innate human tendency.
Basically, we tend to look to others to see if we’re on the right track in life.
This is particularly true in periods of transitions.
Take me, for example.
I just started my fifth and final year as an undergrad (actually, it's my last semester) in September 2015.
Originally, I was suppose to complete all the requirements for a bachelor's degree and walk with my class in June 2015.
Due to unforeseen situations, however, I had to stay one extra semester.
While one more semester isn't bad by any means, it felt like I was drastically falling behind.
The rest of my classmates were graduating and moving on to the next phases of their lives, and I felt like I was just standing still.
I thought of myself as a failure.
Now, I'm a few weeks from graduating.
As I wrap up my time as an undergrad and make decisions for my future, I've realized I still don't feel like I've caught up.
At first glance, it seemed like people knew what they were doing next year, and I was the only one still confused.
Again, I felt like I was falling behind in life.
It wasn't until I talked to the same people I compared myself to that I realized I was completely wrong.
Every single person was confused.
Some didn't receive the offers they wanted. Others were doubting their decisions to go into their fields at all.
Regardless, it became clear I wasn't the only one who was a little lost after all.
Like I said before, we genuinely tend to think we're the only ones who are struggling. We're not.
Practically no one has everything in his or her figured out in college and in the real world.
Everyone of us is struggling with some kind of uncertainty and trying to figure out how to deal with it.
When you begin to realize you're not the only one who feels a little lost, you start to feel more hopeful and optimistic about your future.
It reassures you that you're not failing at life or falling behind.
If anything, being aware of the fact you're feeling lost means you're on the right track.
It means you're ready to make a change.
At every point in life, we are going to compare ourselves against our peers to see how we stack up.
It's important to remember you're only seeing one side of the story.
These people are just as confused as you.
If you're feeling a little lost in life right now, I want to tell you that you are certainly not alone.
Instead of looking at your surroundings and assuming everyone has it all together and it's just you who's messing up, remember that not everyone broadcasts his or her struggles for the world to see.
Most people are lost, but it doesn't mean they'll never find their ways back to their paths.
Pretty soon, everything will work out, and you’ll wonder why you were even worried in the first place.