Why Being Vulnerable Is The Most Attractive Thing A Person Can Do
Do you know what I find incredibly sexy?
People who invest in themselves. People who take the time to sort their sh*t out.
I’m not talking about material investments, like big houses and fancy cars.
I'm talking about time, energy and effort.
I'm talking about going through all your discomforts to get to know yourself and deal with your issues.
It is only the brave who are willing to invest in themselves, open up and do the hard work that needs to be done in order to deal with the challenges in life.
Handling your life means working hard to assess your situation and make decisions about what is right or wrong for you.
This also means finding creative ways to deal with things that hold you back.
There are times when we self-sabotage our own happiness and success without realizing exactly why.
Being brave and courageous means making a decision to get out of our own way.
When we realize we are fully responsible for our own actions and consequences in our lives, it can be scary.
It can also be incredibly liberating, as we can decide to move from destructive habits to healthier ones.
All the little changes ultimately add up to a healthy and happy lifestyle.
If you have something that bothers you about yourself, it is brave to find a way to deal with your issues and challenges, rather than sweeping them under the carpet.
Being vulnerable is allowing yourself to be seen in a way that makes you uncomfortable.
It is the decision not to hide who you really are.
This takes guts.
When you decide to get your life together, it will be one of the most difficult things you do.
But, it will definitely be one of the most rewarding.
Being honest and real, and allowing yourself to be vulnerable, is a true test of who you are as an individual.
As a former perfectionist, I know exactly how it feels to be living your life weighed down by your issues.
I would spend so much of my time worrying about what other people thought of me and trying to be someone everyone liked.
Pleasing everyone is impossible, so I would exhaust myself by running around and trying to keep everyone happy.
My stubborn pride and ego would rather see me suffer for weeks than seem weak and ask for anyone’s help.
Looking back now, it all seems so trivial.
It only defines you if you allow it to.
We like to pretend everything is fine and we have our lives under control because this is what we have been taught is normal.
Many of us (including myself in the past) believe admitting we have a problem or we are not okay is a sign of weakness.
We choose to keep things bottled up because it’s never a good time to talk about issues.
But there's always going to be something uncomfortable we have to deal with, until it all boils over and becomes too much for us to handle.
We end up crying into our cocktails when we're out with our friends on a Friday night.
It’s not exactly very sexy, is it?
In our parents’ generation, emotions and issues were dealt with in a different way.
Our generation is paving a new way, as we are slowly learning how to handle life.
We like to face our issues, instead of pretending they never happened.
We like to work on making ourselves better. We are no longer hiding who we really are.
There comes a moment when we realize our issues are costing us more than we are prepared to pay.
We have to decide to do something about it.
We have to ask for help and support because we genuinely need it.
Every person I have ever met has faced some kind of trauma, hurt, challenge or obstacle in his or her life.
We all have our own issues going on.
Making a decision to work through this, own it and come out stronger on the other side is what helps us recognize and connect with each other.
We are the ones who don’t make excuses for our lives and position.
Rather, we work to be better. We take responsibility for our personal situations.
I know it is scary, but it’s called moving out of your comfort zone for a reason.
The people dealing with their issues discover a thing or two.
They are aware they can’t do it alone, and they recognize when they need some help.
They call for reinforcements. They are not afraid to ask for support when they know they need it.
They deal with their challenges in healthy ways.
They find solutions to problems, they communicate with others and they work on making their lives more functional and enjoyable.
They allow themselves to feel vulnerable.
They are sexy, smart and know being vulnerable is a way to move forward in life.
It's not something to be ashamed of.
They focus on their growth. They know what’s in the past is past.
They grow from the challenges and obstacles life throws their way.
Ultimately, they move forward with their lives.
It’s a long road, and there are so many challenges along the way.
But persistence is sexy, too.
They don’t give up, and they focus on what they want. They work hard to make their passions happen.
Now, that’s sexy.
Different methods work for different people.
All people don't want to speak to a psychologist or pour their hearts out to a close friend.
Some people journal and meditate, while others exercise and travel.
There is no "correct" way of dealing with your issues, as long as progress is the goal.
Owning your sh*t is something worth investing in.
I highly recommend taking a deep look inside yourself.
Haul out the issues that keep you from achieving what you want in this life, and find the best ways to work through them.