Oh, to be 17 again.
Maybe you're currently 17, and if that's the case, please accept my deepest sympathies. But if by some combination of luck and grit you've made it through that godforsaken phase, take a moment and think back.
Remember what it was like? No? Oh, that's right — you (like everyone else) have effectively blocked those memories out in order to live a full, functional and non-traumatized adult life.
The uncomfortable situations and mortifying gaffes are nothing compared to the ever-present cloud of awkwardness that seems to follow all 17-year-olds around as they try (and fail) to figure out who they are.
And now that you've successfully moved on, allow us to reignite your PTSD: Here are seven reasons why life at 17 sucks. I guess in hindsight it's all kind of funny…
*Laughs through the tears*
1. Even though you outgrew your acne phase, you never really felt comfortable in your own skin.
We all had to endure those traumatic years when we'd break out at the mere mention of the word "pimple." But even when that phase was (finally) over, you never quite felt comfortable in your own skin. It's basically impossible to see your good features when you're 17 — you're hardwired to focus on (what you perceive to be) your flaws.
2. Normal human social interactions were a challenge.
You know the feeling — you're walking across the crowded cafeteria when you see someone you don't know well waving enthusiastically at you. "Oh, this is unexpected," you think. But what a nice way to be greeted! So you smile and wave back...until the person hits you with that "WTF?" look and it dawns on you that, OF COURSE, she's waving to someone behind you.
3. You might have had to deal with a friend dating your sibling.
I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy: There's no betrayal like the kind that happens when your best friend starts secretly dating one of your siblings. It doesn't matter if they have "real" feelings or have always pined for one another, there's nothing more nauseating than thinking about your BFF hooking up with your brother or sister. Barf.
4. When you finally got the courage to tell your crush how you felt, you immediately regretted it.
We all had that one moment - that oh f*ck it moment when we decided to live a little and confess our true feelings to our crush. Whether it was over AOL Instant Messenger, in person, or on Snapchat (kids these days...), the fact remained: it was terrifying.
And it was generally followed by a mixture of panic, horror, and regret. Where had that momentary burst of confidence come from, and WHERE OH WHERE did it go?
5. You basically lived in the shadow of your *perfect* sibling.
Unless you were an only child (in which case, JEALOUS) you had that one sibling. You know, the brother or sister who couldn't fail at anything. Sports, academics, relationships, popularity — that guy or gal had it all. Not to mention undying praise from your parents, and pretty much everyone else.
Yes, you loved your sib, but there was always a little part of you that wished your bro or sis would get cut from the soccer team or get dumped at a school dance, so you could take a night off from being the tragic one in your family.
6. You seemed to fit in better with adults than with kids your age.
Maybe it was your morbid sense of humor (we'll just call it dry) or your general lack of interest in the latest who's-dating-who gossip, but sometimes it was easier to relate to older people than to your peers.
7. You put other people on a pedestal and were constantly disappointed when they fell short of your expectations.
When you care deeply about someone, it's easy to build that person up in your mind. Teachers, best friends, crushes - more often than not, it seemed like they weren't capable of doing anything wrong.
This made it especially awkward when they did mess up or do something completely insensitive, leaving you with the brutal (but oh-so-necessary) reminder that none of us has it all figured out, whether we're 17 or 27.
Critics are calling THE EDGE OF SEVENTEEN “a brilliant coming-of-age comedy.” See it in theaters November 18!