Melania Trump's Hilarious Tweets Are Low-Key The Best Things You'll Ever Read
Melania Trump made headlines last week when a section of her speech was clearly plagiarized from a speech given by Michelle Obama years ago. The alleged speech writer admitted to the plagiarizing, but claimed it was accidental. And Melania continues to insist that she had not known about it.
Regardless, Melania has been thrust into the public eye. And, because I am an important journalist, I decided to aimlessly scroll through her Twitter while eating my lunch and trying not to fall asleep. What I found there absolutely delighted me.
Melania Trump's Twitter feed is extremely weird and tremendously fascinating.
Bye! I'm off to my #summmer residence #countryside w#weekend pic.twitter.com/3ogDqsRIDN — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) May 29, 2015
It's hard to tell what percentage of her peculiar idiosyncrasies can be attributed to her foreignness, or to her living the life of an actual queen, or to her just genuinely being an odd person, but whatever the proportions, it's highly entertaining.
Some of her posts are exactly as confusing as they are intriguing.
What is she thinking? pic.twitter.com/rFufrgMb — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) August 10, 2012
I pic.twitter.com/8AnHCnUWTW — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) August 8, 2013
Sometimes, the posts are oddly poetic.
We had colorful & silent visitors in the sky last night... pic.twitter.com/3NMbYl4aGG — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) July 27, 2013
And sometimes they are terrifying...
...stop fucking staring at me, duck.
This is one of my favorites.
Last #Night pic.twitter.com/98XIdhAhTn — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) May 14, 2015
But as I scrolled through these, I began to pick up on a weird pattern: She takes the same photographs over and over — most notably, pictures taken out of plane windows.
@NYC Washington DC pic.twitter.com/zgI1ZxXq1w — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) April 25, 2015
Business trip to #Washington DC w/ @realDonaldTrump pic.twitter.com/NRg7d59443 — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) March 24, 2015
over #Manhattan @CentralParkNYC @nyc pic.twitter.com/L3zyzngw5r — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) February 27, 2015
Seriously, this makes up like 65 percent of her Twitter.
#Manhattan from the sky #home pic.twitter.com/SCHekb7AZq — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) March 29, 2015
✈️ Manhattan pic.twitter.com/6c0Nm6yk8M — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) January 28, 2015
There is literally an endless number of pictures that look exactly like this.
✈️ landing in cloudy & rainy @nyc pic.twitter.com/WKc45wHQlk — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) March 30, 2014
And when it's not photographs of her looking out of plane windows, it's just pictures of the inside of the plane.
NYC pic.twitter.com/YA3G8B0nf5 — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) March 2, 2015
Landing pic.twitter.com/tNZywmYMhs — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) March 25, 2015
#sunset pic.twitter.com/VAVbo9qgar — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) November 7, 2014
Honestly, guys, I'm beginning to get really worried that Donald Trump makes Melania live in a plane.
Ready to take off! pic.twitter.com/VVXw8R3zdt — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) October 10, 2013
The next thing really specific thing that I noticed (because I have absolutely too much time on my hands) is that she can't stop taking pictures of beads of rain on windows.
Rain @NYC pic.twitter.com/rCBDZjHDXz — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) October 22, 2014
It's her favorite thing (after, of course, literally anything to do with planes).
fifth avenue @nyc #architecture pic.twitter.com/bmWqXV78qG — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) December 6, 2014
Icy view pic.twitter.com/95qYCzXvEq — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) February 2, 2015
Again, this entire article could just be 100 more pictures exactly like this.
@CentralParkNYC #fifthavenue @nyc pic.twitter.com/kRxF31wVbj — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) April 30, 2014
#home @nyc pic.twitter.com/hHSTRZy1Nl — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) April 7, 2014
Snow storm @nyc pic.twitter.com/fnvKPhp8qb — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) February 13, 2014
Morning rain in @nyc @CentralParkNYC #Friday pic.twitter.com/jwIHHVItTI — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) December 6, 2013
Also, if you go back only a few years, you see Donald Trump when he was still just a guy on a reality show.
Watching my husband @realDonaldTrump shooting @ApprenticeNBC boardroom. Who will be fired? pic.twitter.com/jQm4JOSw — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) October 20, 2012
But most wonderful of all, considering what happened last week, is this unfortunate exhibit from the social media archive.
Always trust yourself, think for yourself, act for yourself, speak for yourself. Be yourself! — MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) October 25, 2012
Speak for yourself, indeed.
OK, I've been looking at Twitter for absolutely too long. You know what they say, when you stare into the Twitter void, the Twitter void stares back at you — and then says something homophobic.