On Tuesday, BabyCenter released data showing rising trends in what parents are naming their offspring in 2015.
Among YouTube stars, astrological terms, and characters from YA novels, one of the more interesting threads is the uptick in babies named after Instagram filters:
That's all fine and dandy, but with marijuana becoming more and more culturally acceptable, and nearly legal in many states, will we see a jump in marijuana-strain-naming in 2016?
We can only imagine. Here are my top picks for the strain babies:
Everyone loves a built-in nickname.
"Ayyy what up, chemDAWWWWWG." Wow. Efficient. Also maybe they'll excel at chemistry and do well in school and get a great job! Anything can happen!
2. Bubba Kush
3. Tahoe OG
Maybe you want a beer-chugging, neon-sunglasses-wearing, ASU-attending party bro?
With the new "Star Wars" film right around the corner, this timely name will seem futuristic yet relevant.
It will win the hearts of old nerds everywhere and stoke the geeky fires of a new generation.
If your child is embarrassed by being named after a weed strain, the kid can simply let new acquaintances assume it's in reference to the hallowed sci-fi franchise.
Wait...that's embarrassing too...
6. Sour Diesel
I don't know anyone who would want to breed a sex-addicted PUA but hey, different strokes for different folks!
7. White Widow
Bam. You've got yourself a super villain.
8. Durban Poison
Bam. You've got yourself a professional wrestler.
9. Alaskan Thunder Fuck
Bam. You've got yourself...well, I don't know, man, maybe don't use this one. Yeah this probably isn't a good idea.