Why Wardrobe Malfunctions Might Be A Cry For Attention
This past Monday, Lenny Kravitz had what most would call a wardrobe malfunction.
While he was performing "American Woman" at a concert in Sweden, an ambitious squat-like dance move literally split Kravitz’s pants at the crotch, exposing a bare penis (save some sparkly jewelry).
The mishap caused Kravitz to quickly leave the stage to, um, sort things out.
Although part of me wants to feel badly for poor Lenny, I can’t help but be a little skeptical of the whole situation. I mean, it seems as though virtually no precautionary measures were taken.
Anyone who performs in tight leather pants should definitely double and triple-check to make sure they’re flexible enough to last the entire performance.
Maybe even get your pants custom fit or, I don’t know, whatever celebrities do these days. There has to be some material out there that looks like leather but doesn’t tear.
The world can’t possibly have leggings that look like jeans, but not leggings that look like rockstar pants. Where you at, Lenny’s wardrobe people?
And why was he not wearing underwear? Seriously. As a tight-pant wearer myself, I get the whole “avoid panty lines” thing, but seriously? Not even a thong or something?!
With a fashionista daughter like Zoë, there’s no way a solution to panty lines hasn’t come up at the dinner table.
It’s also important to note that the whole mishap occurred in the middle of the stage. Lenny was FRONT AND CENTER. This incident could have been covered up much more easily if he were in the back or on the side of his set, but nope, Kravitz was front and center for all eyes to see.
Another issue is the rather conspicuous penis jewelry.
It’s like he knew his junk was going to be exposed, so he chose his favorite accessory to add a little shimmer when the “wardrobe malfunction” occurred.
It reminds me of the all-too-familiar Janet Jackson incident of 2004, which we later found out was an intentional “costume reveal” after all.
Did Lenny Kravitz not watch the Super Bowl that year, or did he watch it super closely and try to take a page out of Janet’s book? Ugh, I have so many unanswered questions.
When situations like this occur, the conspiracy theorist in me comes out, and I have to entertain the idea of it all being a hoax.
It always seems that when an artist’s career is on a downward slope, a controversy arises and ends up boosting his or her career. People start talking about the forgotten star again.
I mean, look at me for example: I’m writing a whole article about Lenny, even though I haven’t listened to his music in years.
Robin Thicke had all but disappeared until his misogynistic "Blurred Lines" video went viral.
Chris Brown revamped his career after a few misdemeanors dubbed him a Hollywood bad boy. Charlie Sheen went crazy, and people started following him on Twitter again.
While all of these situations are undeniably different, they do have one thing in common: They gave these celebs some much-needed attention. Even though the attention is typically negative, it puts these stars back in the spotlight, and that’s what they live for.
I can’t conclusively say Lenny Kravitz's mishap is definitely a publicity stunt, but I can speculate. No matter what the truth is, though, people are talking about Lenny again, and maybe that will boost his career.
I honestly wish Lenny the best in his future endeavors, not that he cares what I think.
He is a rockstar after all. Perhaps an even more popular one, now.