What the f*cking f*ck are you up to, Selena Gomez?
Do you think it's OK to just be like, "Hey, I made a film, it's coming out tomorrow"? WE HAD LIVES BEFORE THIS. WE HAD PLACES TO BE AND YOU HAD US GLUED TO OUR COMPUTERS, LOSING MONEY WHILE WE WAITED, PROBABLY.
In case you haven't heard, Selena Gomez tweeted an announcement on Monday that left the internet... quite... quite shook.
She announced she made a film for her single "Bad Liar," a film that was set to be released today. OF ALL DAYS. (There is nothing special about June 14. I'm just stressed.)
We had literally no other context than this: A "Bad Liar" film exists, and it would come out on Wednesdsay, June 14. No idea what time, how we'd watch it, or how long it would be.
Was it going to be a feature-length film? Most likely not. Homegirl doesn't have time for that and wouldn't just announce a full-length film to be premiered the next day with just a day's notice.
Was it going to be a long-a** music video? Most likely yes. Michael Jackson used to make long-form music videos all the time, and just about every artist ever has followed suit. Gaga does it. Kanye does it. Beyoncé — our Lord, light, and savior — does it.
And now Selena Gomez has thrown her name onto that list.
The "Bad Liar" film was just released, and I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty freaking trippy. I like it. Give me 20 more minutes and I'll probably love it. But Twitter already does, obviously.
The film features Gomez doing a whole bunch of ~fun stuff~, but it isn't as long we guessed! It's the same length of the song itself, so this is basically a "Bad Liar" music video part two.
(There was another music video created and exclusively released on Spotify, but it seems to have been taken down.)
You can watch the whole film here, but let's break some things down, shall we?
First off, we open to Selena Gomez riding a bike down a ~mountain terrain~.
She's apparently riding her bike to a school. 'Cause she's apparently a student?
Then, we see Gomez revealed as a bunch of different characters: herself, her character's dad (who is also a teacher at the school), her character's mom, and her character's gym teacher.
Selena as a gym teacher with the greatest head of hair I've ever seen:
Selena as a dad with arguably not as great hair, but a fantastic mustache:
Selena as a 1978 mom with some BOMB eyelashes:
BASICALLY, the story this music video is telling goes like this: Selena Gomez is a high school student whose dad (played by Gomez, as we know) is a teacher at her school.
She sees her dad flirting with the v attractive gym teacher (also played by Gomez), and is like "WTF, DAD? OK, I'm just gonna be quiet and think to myself."
Then we see the dad sitting at a dinner table in a home with who can only be his wife/Selena's mom (also played by Selena...). Then Selena walks in, and in all her ~teen angst~ is like, "Ugh, mom and dad," then goes to her room, as all teens do.
In her room she starts dancing around, then at the end, we find out the person she can't get out of her head is the gym teacher her dad is also into.