Everyone needs help getting into the holiday spirit with actual spirits.
No, I'm not talking about some weird Scrooge-adventure complete with ghosts of Christmas past, present and future. I'm talking about alcohol.
And just in time for the holiday season this year, there's a tried and true hangover cure from one of the sexiest soccer players alive, David Beckham.
Not sure what his sex appeal or occupation have to do with a hangover cure, but people tend to trust beautiful people more than hobgoblins.
Beckham, 41 and retired from soccer, probably has a lot more time to drink now that he's off the pitch.
He recently let GQ in on his old family secret that has been passed down for generations: how to cure a hangover.
Step one? Take an Alka Seltzer tablet before bed. Step two? Down a bacon sandwich in the morning.
My granddad told me to do that.
Plop, plop, fizz, fizz. Oh, what a relief it is.
I've never used Alka Seltzer to cure what ails me, but the sodium bicarbonate (AKA the baking soda) in the medicine helps calm your sick tummy by neutralizing stomach acid.
But I know all about that bacon sandwich.
My hangover cure includes the biggest, greasiest breakfast you can find: bacon, taylor ham, chorizo and corn beef hash. And with plenty of toast.
Animal fat, carbs and grease basically destroys a hangover, even if food is the last thing you want to see in the morning.
I'm not a doctor, but I have drank a lot.
Beckham's cure for hangover makes a lot more sense than other celebrity hangovers.
Take Gwyneth Paltrow for instance. She says,
Just draw a bath that is as hot as you can handle it and mix in some Epsom salts and baking soda. Soak for 20 minutes and then pop into a freezing-cold shower for one minute. Get back in the hot bath and stay until you're warmed up. Then get back in the shower for one more minute.
Paltrow?! Who has the time!?
How many baths do you think we have?
There is a drought in California, Paltrow!