Among the chaos of Tuesday's election and subsequent unraveling of the free world, a baby was born.
A tiny little glimmer of hope from Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian named "Dream."
I'm not talking about how they metaphorically gave birth to the concept of dreaming. I'm talking about an actual legit baby that they *sigh* named Dream.
Kim Kardashian, who is Dream Kardashian-Chyna's technical aunt, has some advice for the parents.
As is the norm nowadays, instead of just telling them in a thoughtful message or phone call, she decided to post that advice to her own personal website and app.
So listen up, new parents! Kim Kardashian's app says that "It's about ALWAYS being prepared!!!" and what better way to get prepared than immediately buying everything Kim says she carries with her in her baby bag.
For starters, you KNOW apple juice is a must-have.
You're also going to need a bunch of diapers. For poop reasons.
This fancy ass baby onesie from Nordstrom is a MUST.
Can't forget Pottery Barn baby blankets.
Don't forget Cheez-Its, which could very well just be there for the parents.
Doritos are on this list for some reason. I'm beginning to think Kim has no idea how to feed children.
Please include this cute ass baby pacifier.
Baby bottles are obviously crucial for having a baby that survives.
Here are scented wipes, for the mom that wants her baby's butthole to smell like the Lipton factory.
And here are disposable diaper sacks because babies are disgusting.
A changing pad is a must-have, also because babies are disgusting.
So, there you have it, new parents. If you want your baby to have even the smallest social media presence, get your hands on all of this baby shit.