Merely one day before the Beyoncé Bowl brought the entire country together in the tradition of pretending to watch sports, King Bey's video for “Formation” dropped, and fans went insane.
It's nothing new for 'Yoncé to slay look after look in a vid, causing the BeyHive to clamor for “Kale” sweatshirts and, in this case, jewelry so deadly I'm writing this as my own ghost.
The DYLANLEX pieces worn by Beyoncé in “Formation” are the kind anyone with a sense of style and poor money management would love to be buried with, heirs be damned.
These earrings are perfect for catching even more light from a spotlight already shining directly on you because you're important AF, obviously.
This is a goddamn two-piece necklace because one piece of a necklace is just the beginning of a necklace when you're wearing THE FREAKING SAME NECKLACE AS BEYONCÉ GISELLE KNOWLES-CARTER.
This is what handcuffs look like in hot, rich person prison. I would commit endless white-collar crimes just to be gently placed under arrest in this cuff and then jetted to a fancy, luxury penitentiary by Hollywood Officer Christopher Meloni.
Buy enough of these and you can cover your arms to look like a glamorous Tin Woodman/woman. There's no place like home, except there is, and it's called anywhere someone can see me wearing these.
I take back everything I said about one-piece necklaces. This is the kind of necklace you trade your neck for and wear as a hat because you need it more than you need to breathe/eat/speak/survive.
Drew Ginsburg, who crafts each DYLANLEX piece by hand, is New York-based, but thanks to the wizardry of the Internet, anyone can cover his or her body in these statement pieces.
These things are made with Swarovski Crystal, antique metals and probably ancient enchantments cast by dead Salem witches.
Paying rent is important to me, but so is looking like a woman who eats the hearts of lesser men for breakfast.
It can't hurt to browse.