Signs You Should Avoid Your Crush, As Told By Trump Tweets

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A fuckboy can either be easy-to-spot or hiding in plain sight.

Both are chronic time-wasters, but the latter are by far the most dangerous. They'll make you fall in love (or passionate lust) and before you know it, you're entangled with the biggest sucker ever.

The way to prevent the heartache, irritation and confusion is to broaden your understanding of what a fuck boy actually is. It's so much deeper than slow-texting and cancelled date nights.

Thank me later for these tell-tale signs.

We'll be using the help of Head Fuckboy In Charge, President Donald Trump.

1. He expresses pity for men convicted of assault.

Trump, Your Royal Pussy Grabber, knows how to address sexual assault on Twitter. But when he takes a stance on the issue, it's not to address the allegations made against himself; it's to suggest that rape and sexual assault are inevitable whenever men and women are merely in one another's presence.

Any guy who even remotely suggests sexual assault is natural is a walking, talking red flag.

Any guy who even remotely suggests sexual assault is natural is a walking, talking red flag.

If he's writing off rape as anything other than an atrocious act, then any notion of his hotness should be written off as fake news.

2. He negs women.

I call this the "no disrespect but..." syndrome.

Guys who suffer from it say things like, "I won't call her a slut but..." or, "I would never call a girl a bitch, but..." you get the point.

They try to cut corners and find ways to degrade women while using their "this isn't my normal behavior" line as a way to keep up their Mr. Nice Guy facade.

3. He has to constantly say he's not racist.

Trump doesn't "love Hispanics," as evidenced by all the times he's insulted them. He just loves the taco bowls sold at his own restaurant. And he loves thinking he's not racist.

Any guy who goes out of his way to prove how not-racist he is while using racist behavior is the ultimate douche.

4. He rarely shows sympathy. 

There's something almost sinister about a guy who rarely shows sympathy for others.

It's a sign that he also won't be all that compassionate and empathic during any relationship you two try to build together.

5. He avoids blame when he's wrong.

Trump accused Barack Obama of committing a felony against him, and although the FBI shared that there is "no evidence" of the former president wiretapping Trump's phones during the 2016 election, no one from the Trump administration has released an apology.

Careful with a fella who won't attempt to right his wrongs with an apology (at the bare minimum). If he's not offering apologies for cancelling a date at the last minute or inconveniencing you in anyway, then he lacks humility.

6. The only women he respects are the ones in his family.

Unfortunately, too many guys fall in to this.

Women are all "bitches," "hoes" and lying about sexual assault... unless they are related to him. A great guy doesn't throw respect out of the window just because a woman isn't related to him.

7. He reduces women's worth to his assessment of their beauty. 

Women don't have to be meet mainstream standards of beauty to be valuable.

Women don't have to be meet mainstream standards of beauty to be valuable.

If you find that your crush seems to always describe women with an analysis of her looks, then beware. He's shallow and incredibly misogynistic.

8. His timing is always insensitively off.

His timing may not be as bad as as a pompous, self-serving tweet for 9/11.

But if your crush is always quick to joke during a serious moment or constantly using inappropriate moments to talk about himself, then you need to crush his chances of dating you. Dude sucks.

9. His humble brag crosses over into cockiness.

A man with money is hardly a bad thing; one who constantly runs his mouth about it is a problem.

They are usually entitled and willing to spend money on you just so they can brag about it. Careful with this crush.

Moral of the story: Crushing on a new guy feels great, but keep your eye open for these red flags.

He may be suave, but that doesn't make him automatically worthy of praise.