17 Tweets About Getting Married That’ll Make You Wonder Why Anybody Would Do This

by Alexia LaFata

My parents are high school sweethearts. (I know, it's adorable.) Some days, I am convinced they're truly in love. They are affectionate with each other and really do seem like they're each other's partner-in-crime, and it's a beautiful thing to witness. Other days, they solely communicate through bloodcurdling screams. It is miraculous and somewhat hilarious to watch how rapidly their behavior shifts from lovey dovey to literal disgust. Seriously, how do they do it? I don't know, you guys. But that's marriage for you!

Personally, I'm not one to shy away from something great, despite the fact that there's a risk it could eventually suck. I absolutely want to get married, even if that means I face the possibility of my husband growing to resent and divorce me. (That 50 percent divorce rate is real and it's scary.) But when I hear my mom talk about how much she wants to kill my dad (again), or if I learn about a couple who hasn't had sex in, like, five years, I can't help but think, Why would anyone torture themselves with marriage?

Here are 17 tweets about marriage that'll make you think the same. (And also laugh, because these are funny and kind of make me want to get married more. What? What? I didn't say that.)

Your spouse doesn't leave you alone.

They kind of suck, actually.

Your sex life disappears.

You don't experiment anymore.

Texting is monotonous.

You get bored.

Your partner is useless around the house.

The lies accumulate.

Schedules get hectic.

You have to share a bed forever.

Both parties stop making an effort.

The passion dies.

You get manipulated.

Kids just make it all worse.

You get tired of hanging out.

Your husband goes full dad.

You low-key want to kill them all the time.

Doesn't marriage seem awesome?

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