While dating a Sagittarius can be rewarding, it can also feel infuriating sometimes.
If you plan on dating one, keep in mind that, although they can be optimistic, romantic and fiery freedom seekers, they can also be frenetic, dark and overly idealistic.
I've dated my fair share of Sagittarians, and the dominant characteristic they all share is an air of mystery.
That mystery is what pulled me in and gave our relationships passion, but it's also what ended things.
If you want to date a Sagittarius, you must be calm, balanced, adventurous, patient, generous and forgiving. Cultivating these traits within yourself will help you enjoy a Sagittarius' personality.
But when it comes to the Sagittarius themselves, here are four things I learned about them after dating them:
1. They tend to be introverted.
First of all, Sagittarians are introverted and a bit secretive. Perhaps this is because the Sagittarius sign spans from November 23 through December 21 — a time when the world is darkening, days are getting shorter and temperatures are dropping.
These qualities can make a person seem mysterious, obviously, but it can also be a little frustrating if you're hoping for more intimacy.
For example, in college, I dated a Sagittarius (Nate) who refused to tell me when his birthday was. Another Sagittarius I dated disappeared for a whole week. I actually called his family and friends, but no one knew where he was.
But at the same time, a Sagittarius is also someone who can be trusted with your secrets. When Nate and I sat in his dorm room smoking hookah, I could say anything, and he would listen without judgement.
2. They struggle to find equilibrium.
The second thing I learned about Sagittarians is, they struggle to find equilibrium.
The tarot card Temperance, card 14 of the Major Arcana, is the one associated with this astrological sign. It represents balance and controlled urges.
Most Sagittarians struggle in these categories, and instead, they exist between extremes — either overly restrained or overly reckless.
Nate also oscillated from one extreme to the other. While positively speaking, he was incredibly organized, he was also very restrained and restrictive when it came to food.
As his girlfriend, I wanted to help him find balance, but he put up his walls. So if you date a Sagittarius (or anyone for that matter), remember, they must want to find balance. You can't force them to do it.
3. They desire to teach and help others.
I learned Sagittarians long to teach people and will go to the ends of the Earth to help others. And by dating a Sagittarius, you may be the recipient of great generosity.
Nate eventually became a holistic health practitioner after we both moved on, and he was committed to helping others heal. Eventually, after both of us had moved on, and once he found his calling, the other elements of his life fell into place.
Unsurprisingly, it was around this time that he finally committed to his relationship and got married. When a Sagittarius is happy with their own life's direction, that happiness will bleed into other areas of their life, like you relationship.
4. They're extremely passionate beings.
Lastly, Sagittarians are known for being passionate in everything they do.
Although hotheaded and prone to gambling, Sagittarians are ruled by fire and the sun. They're frank, sensual beings who will take you on wildly romantic adventures.
They are intense lovers who seek deep connections, and despite their flaws, they are loyal to those with a similar passion for excitement and who have the patience to stick around.