"Why on earth are you single?"
Welcome to my life. At this point, I should have a button over my heart that says, "I just haven't met 'the one'" every time it's pushed. I would be like one of those creepy bears.
I feel like chugging a bottle of tequila every time I hear this question. Being 31, single and looking for Mr. Right is probably the scariest effing thing in the world. But, there is also something so special and liberating about it.
There are so many things to look forward to once you find the right man. Those are the things that, as single ladies, we should focus on and fantasize about. Don't stress about when he will fall out of the sky and hand you some bling.
In the past, I would be dying in bed for two months after a breakup. My friends and family would be like, "Get up, and get out there. We can't wait to see who's next."
Like, seriously? Don't you see me all white, pasty and skinny? But, they were always right.
Getting out there and being excited about your journey is the only way to attract the people you want. There is too much awesomeness in you for you to get sad about getting older and being single. My name is Lindsi, and yes, I am 31 and single.
I am pretty much the only single one left out of my best friends. But, that doesn't make me weird, crazy or a lunatic. I just know what I'm worth, and I'm waiting for a worthy man.
If you feel discouraged (and we all have our off days), then remember your future man is looking for you, too. So, just trust the universe, and try to relax.
My friends have always been impressed by my continuous fight for love, and I want to rub that strength off on you. Being 31 and single makes you a goddess and a role model.
Here are the reasons why:
1. You have life experience.
It doesn't matter whether it's regarding your career, relationships or love. You ride the wave that life has to offer as the years go on. With life experience comes brain power. With brain power comes knowledge, and with knowledge comes weeding out the men you know you don't want.
2. You will never settle.
The question we used to ask ourselves was, "If I'm single at 31, won't he think I'm crazy, or that something is wrong with me?"
But now, we ask ourselves, "Is this guy good enough for me?" Boy, have the tables turned.
3. You know who you are.
You have grown to love every bit of yourself, even the flaws. When a man sees you embrace your individuality, he swoons over you. Your confidence is his biggest turn-on.
4. You're comfortable with your sexuality.
Everyone has different preferences and opinions when it comes to leading a comfortable sex life. Sex is a healthy form of expression. You should love who you are and what you look like naked. You should also be comfortable with physical interaction.
This doesn't always pertain to intercourse or even being in a bed, for that matter. This can be something as small (but as heartwarming) as holding hands. This should make you feel good. You should want to make others feel good as well.
5. You're confident.
I truly believe confidence radiates from within. If you feel good on the inside, you will shine on the outside. Your confidence, personality and happiness together combine to form a sexy trio any man would be lucky to have.
6. You know what you want.
Your tolerance for "boys" has completely subsided. Your thirst for quality men should be quenched by their desire to be consistent with your needs and make you feel good. If he doesn't make you feel good, toss him to the side, babe.
7. You know how to get what you want.
I can sell ice to an eskimo. You know how to get someone to desire you when he or she sparks your interest. You've had a lot of practice with trial and error when it comes to your career, life and love.
So, when you want something, you aren't scared to go for it. If you don't ask, you don't get. (My dad was right.)
8. You're independent.
You control your destiny, so enjoy the journey. Take a deep breath, and go with it.
You don't need a man to be happy, and you don't need to conform to what everyone else is doing. You just need to be happy, healthy and strong. A man will just be an added bonus in your already wonderful life.
9. Your life excites your friends.
Your friends want you to be with the best possible person for you. I literally don't know what I would do without the support of my girlfriends as I continue on this journey.
While your other friends are married with children, you can do you and enjoy your "me" time. Let's be honest: The group chats with your married BFFs begin at 7 am after you had a hot date the night before. They love living vicariously through you, and their encouragement is so uplifting.
10. You can go out with your younger friends and get mistaken for being younger than you are.
This is something I've become extremely proud of. People think I still look 27.
11. You're dating in order to look for "the one."
Like I said above, I refuse to date boys anymore. It's all about the men. You are only worthy of a man who is worthy of you, so don't forget that.
You should also remember he is out there, and he's looking for you, too. Timing is everything.
12. You get to fall in love again.
This is surely the best, most exciting thing about being 31 and single. I still get to look forward to butterflies, heart palpitations and 24/7 bliss. There is no better feeling than this. (Yes, I even just rhymed by accident. It's that special. Sigh.)
This article was previously published on the author's personal blog.