Why Running Out Of Things To Say In A Relationship Is A Good Thing
I'm a talker.
As an avid writer and reader, my mind is constantly reeling with thoughts of the last paragraph I read, structuring the next sentence I'm going to write and sputtering out coherent words to form the sentence I'm presently saying aloud.
Various mediums of communication are flowing through me at every moment of the day.
In a single day, I communicate with myself and others in so many ways and at such a mass volume that sometimes, when it's all said and done, I'm left with little more than a grunt and a smile over dinner.
If you think about it, this is the case for most people.
Without realizing it, we're all communicating in some form, on some platform or another, throughout the day. While not all communication is going to be verbal, communication of some sort remains.
All this back and forth can be exhausting. A single, uneventful day can actually leave you more drained than you might realize.
Few people can go on in an Energizer bunny-esque fashion without recharging. Everyone needs a little down time to recuperate.
Enter your relationship, the priority your heart allots for said leisure time. See the conflict?
At the start of any new coupling, there isn't anything you aren't excited to say to one another. Any excuse for conversation is a good one, if it means quality time with the person.
This is great and healthy. But, this is also totally temporary.
Speaking from personal experience, I'll be the first to tell you honeymooners what's to come: long, luxurious beats of silence.
Don't worry, this doesn't mean the romance is dead. This doesn't mean he's taken his conversation elsewhere.
If your relationship is in a good place, and you haven't done anything to warrant the silent treatment, it's understandable to wonder why your SO is suddenly so quiet over dinner.
But stay calm because it's all part of the program.
When two people slip into a comfortable place in their relationship and become more of stable fixtures in each other's lives, the dynamic is bound to change.
You're no longer in a place where you're trying to get to know one another from birth to present day. That's been done.
You've played 21 questions and talked in depth about your views on everything, from the latest Marvel flick to why Donald Trump should or shouldn't be forced to wear a muzzle in public.
You've shared late-night conversations on the phone and progressed past the kind of pillow talk that has you chatting while weaving in and out of sleep until your alarm goes off.
The lengthy midday calls have now been subbed for random texts while you go about your day, and the "good morning" phone call is now a poke in the back from his own personal morning alarm clock as you both roll out of bed.
Silence has set up shop, and it's a thing of beauty. Instead of fearing the quiet, appreciate it for what it is: a sign of maturity and growth in your relationship.
Two people cannot realistically spend their lives working to entertain one another. At some point, comfort is going to set in, and you're going to have less to say.
This doesn't mean you've hit a roadblock in communication, or you're becoming bored of the other person's company.
It simply means you've both become so in tune with the other and so at ease in each other's presence, having another person around while you unwind from the day has become as easy as if you were alone.
The moment you find yourself greeting someone at the end of the day with little to say but a smile and a silent cuddle on the couch, you know you've ventured past the preliminaries and embarked on something a little more true to life.
The ability to just be with someone and shut off in his or her company is an indicator you've truly connected on a level that needs no caption.
Trust me, there are few things more intimate between two people than finding yourself completely in sync without saying a word.