I recently provided a guideline on how modern guys can transform into gentlemen, proving they still exist and thrive in modern society.
However, this one is for you ladies. You'll come across a number of guys who simply don't understand how to speak to a woman. Some will diminish your point of view, others will degrade you and there will be those who speak to you as if you're somehow obligated to serve them.
Obviously, none of these scenarios are what women look for when meeting a new guy.
It's even worse on social media. If you go on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter or YouTube, you'll have sensory overload from the level of ridiculous comments from guys who have no idea how to speak to a woman.
You know, the comments which body-shame women, graphically tell strangers what they'd like to do to them or even worse -- sed unsolicited dick pics.
It's understandable if women feel there aren't many men who have the ability to have a real conversation with them. Luckily that isn't the case, as there are men out there who know how to treat women with respect (I promise!).
1. A gentleman will be polite.
Don't confuse this with boring. I'm not talking about the stereotypical, game-spitting guy who will usually be the first to approach you at bars, clubs and house parties.
More than likely, these guys aren't gentleman, especially if they immediately pivot to talking points without any substantive conversation. A gentleman is more subtle, engaged and polite.
The gentleman will not be sexually aggressive. Instead, he will introduce himself and begin a real conversation with you. If the two of you are in a loud setting and have to lean close to one another, he will keep his hands to himself until you give some sort of signal that you are comfortable with him touching you.
He will be far more interested in getting to know you. Gentlemen are not into cheap groping and will respect the boundaries you set.
2. A gentleman will actively participate in the conversation.
A gentleman will always be present during a conversation, regardless of the situation. What does that mean? Not only will he ask topical questions which show he's paying attention, but he will give you an adequate amount of time to speak during the conversation as well.
His body language will show he's listening by nodding along, laughing when appropriate and visibly reacting to your comments.
If he's disinterested every time you speak, it's likely he's not actively listening or he doesn't care what you have to say. A gentleman will remain interested and engaged, even if he disagrees with something you say.
3. He ignores antiquated expectations.
Instead of believing in antiquated ideas, the gentleman will take a modern approach. If you want to pay for your own meal, open your door or anything else, he will not take offense, as he will respect your independence.
A gentleman will respect you as an equal. He also will be aware of the numerous challenges facing women in society, and will not brush them aside or say, "It could be worse."
A gentleman will not have his masculinity challenged by strong women. In fact, being in the company of a strong woman will intrigue him and give him more confidence. Why?
Because strong women are sexy. It's really that simple.
4. A gentleman will adapt to numerous situations.
A gentleman will understand how to pick up on social cues, even if you flat-out reject him. He will not talk down to you, call you names or act like a spoiled child. Instead, he will politely walk away.
Not only will a gentleman be willing to have a respectful conversation with you, he will know when you want to pick things up a bit. When kissing you, a gentleman will show compassion, tact and skill. He won't be the guy who simply shoves his tongue all the way down your throat.
Gentlemen excel in conversation and intimacy because they genuinely care and are interested in who you are as a person and not just how hot you are. And they do exist -- so don't lose hope.