What Are You Wearing? Science Wants You To Sext Your Damn Heart Out
Ever since we were all in middle school, the idea that sexting is the worst thing you can ever do has been permanently seared into our brains.
We've watched celebrities' lives crumble and everyday people lose their jobs as their private photos and messages became leaked into cyberspace and beyond -- far, far beyond.
But researchers at Drexel University weren't convinced that sexting is really all that terrible. They wanted to examine the REAL effects of sexting, which, for scientific purposes, they defined as "the sending or receiving of sexually suggestive or explicit content via text message, primarily using a mobile device."
In their study, they asked 870 men and women, ages 18 to 82, about their sexting behaviors, motives to sext and relationship and sexual satisfaction.
Turns out that a LOT of people are sexting -- and are reaping a wide variety of benefits.
Eighty-eight percent of survey respondents admitted ever having sexted in their lives, and 82 percent reported sexting in the past year.
Seventy-five percent of those respondents said they've sexted in a committed relationship, while 43 percent said they did so in a casual relationship.
And, according to the study, the more you sext, the better your sex life and the more satisfied you are in your relationship.
Lead researcher Emily Stasko, MS, MPH, of Drexel University, said that these results demonstrate a "robust relationship" between sexting, satisfaction in your sex life and relationship satisfaction.
She says that we all focus so much on the negatives of sexting that the ways this kind of open sexual communication can actually benefit a relationship become completely ignored.
She's right. Every sexually active Millennial with a cell phone has been scared sh*tless of sexting, but deep down, we also know there's nothing quite like a good old-fashioned sexting session to rev up our engines and increase our libido.
Besides sexual and relationship satisfaction, there are plenty of other wonderful reasons why every single one of us should be sexting.
It sustains your sexual energy when you're single.
If you've been in a dating rut, a good, lasting sexting session will sustain you for a long time.
You can just go back and re-read the conversation later if you get horny again.
It calms you down.
Sexting can be used as a distraction. If you're feeling anxious, all you have to do is text your boyfriend and get him to send you a dick pic or a flirty message about what he wants to do to you tonight.
That thing that concerned you five minutes ago is nowhere near on your radar now.
It's not messy.
Real life sex can be messy. It comes with emotional bullsh*t, unflattering light and exchanges of weird body fluids. But none of these things come with sexting.
The connection you can get via sexting is unique and intimate, but it doesn't actually require you to risk STDs or put your heart on the line.
It's a wonderful way to have sex without actually having sex.
It lets you use your words.
You don't always get to use your words during real sex. Sure, some people love dirty talk, but some people really, really hate it, and that can lead to a lot of awkward silences in the bedroom during which you just don't get to communicate what you want your partner to do.
Sexting allows you to get better at voicing exactly what you want without any of the embarrassment that might come from face-to-face dirty talk.
Then, the next time you actually have real sex, your partner could think about what you said during a sexting session and know exactly how to please you.
It makes you feel sexy.
Many of us are guilty of sexting when we feel the total opposite of sexy.
We've got our hair in a gross bun on top of our heads, we aren't wearing any makeup, and we've almost finished eating an entire bag of Doritos, and yet we're telling our crush how much harder we want him to f*ck us. Oh yeah, just like that, mmhmm, yep.
Regardless of how much we look and feel like sh*t, however, we know that sexting makes us feel sexy, and that's way, way better.
Sexting lets us feel hot, desired and wanted -- all without leaving the comfort of our Snuggie.
It makes your life exciting.
Real sex has to be planned. It has to be done somewhere private and quiet, where nobody can hear you or catch you in the act.
But sexting can be done anywhere, at any time. You can do it during the workday, while on the subway or mid real-life conversation.
It's a versatile and effective way to satisfy your horniness -- whenever it may strike.