The Reasons Why Your Long Distance Relationship Will Never Work No Matter How Hard You Try
Long distance relationships have to be almost as bad to society as catfishing. It is such a burdensome and taxing experience, it's extremely difficult to understand why anyone would put themselves through such an experience. Before we delve into this and I fully break down each reason this type of relationship is pointless and doesn't work, we must understand that I am referring to a long distance relationship that is greater than two months.
It is important that we make this distinction because there are always those people who have been separated for two weeks and think they survived a long distance relationship. That is just bush league in comparison to the types of relationships people have. Some even last for years, when they seldom see each other and their only forms of communication come via texts, phone calls and social media.
Such relationships require much effort and in the end many people realize that it isn't even worth it. Many people go into their freshman year of college expecting a relationship with their high school sweet heart to last 4 years without much face-to-face contact. Although this is great for people who are really dedicated, it a pointless experience for most who bother torturing themselves with it. Below you will find a breakdown of the reasons why your long distance relationship won't work. Take these points into consideration next time you're faced with a tough situation.
Most of your relationship problems stem from distance and not actual relationship problems.
There is one thing about being in a relationship and dealing with the normal problems in person, but it's something else entirely when there is distance between you two. Most of your problems will not occur because of normal boyfriend/girlfriend issues.
The fact that you guys can't see each other often will prove to be a problem. Most of the time, your arguments will deal with distance rather than real relationship issues. This will prove to be taxing on the mind and it is extra stress that can be avoided by taking this advice and realizing that your long distance relationship isn't going to work.
Distance doesn't make your heart grow fonder, it makes you forget about your partner.
Many people feel that distance helps people grow closer, what they don't take into account is time. While being in a relationship, being away from each other a month or two may actually be more beneficial to your relationship than hurtful. However, people do not take into consideration that this distance, over a longer period of time, does not work the same way.
Time, coupled with distance, really makes for a difficult situation. Although many may say that distance is bringing you guys closer, it is actually doing the opposite. The longer you stay away, the more likely you are to forget about them; it's more like the cliché, "out of site, out of mind." Next time someone tells you distance makes the heart grow fonder, ask them the longest amount of time they've been away from their partner.
You can find something just as good, closer and with more rewards.
Relationships are all about compromise; where one pushes, the other has to pull in order to keep a balanced relationship. However, when distance is involved, it is unfair to both parties. Each of you is putting in so much effort to make this work, yet your rewards are few and far between. In a situation like this, the amount of effort does not equate to the reward. In a relationship as such, you will deal with more hardships than rewards.
No one said relationships are easy, but putting in so much work for little reward just isn't worth it any more. All you have to do is look around you and you will be sure to find something that is as good with more rewards. Be honest with yourself and really ask yourself if it's really worth it.
You can't cuddle.
For all the people out there who like to cuddle, a long distance relationships is not your friend. You will feel super lonely at times because there is no body-to-body contact at all. Also Skype isn't a good enough tool to take away the feeling of loneliness.
Because of the distance, cuddling is practically impossible. You will find yourself hugging your pillows on those lonely autumn nights and there is nothing you can do about it. Our best recommendation is not to put yourself through the agony and break up with your partner if you know you guys will be apart for a long period of time.
When you finally get to see your partner, it's only for a limited time.
In a long distance relationship, there will be those times when both your schedules work out and you will be able to finally meet your partner after a long while. Although these times are great, it is important to point out the fact that they do not last long. When you finally get to see your partner, you will spend most of your time having sex in order to catch up on lost time, but it's never enough. Then before you know it, your time together is over and it's time for you guys to go your separate ways.
Skype sex just isn't enough.
Unfortunately, there is only one type of sex you're going to have during a long distance relationship. Although it can get ratchet at times, Skype sex, is the only way you are going to get any action. You are so set that your long distance relationship is going to work that you are willing to try and stay loyal. With all the temptation around you, this is the most difficult part of the relationship. It is extremely hard to stay loyal especially when each of you is not having sex on a consistent basis.
You are flooded with constant temptation.
As human beings, we all have urges and this is just a normal part of our everyday lives. The problem is that with a long distance relationships, the separation time always gives you more reason to cheat. It is highly likely that you haven't had real sex in a while and you are just dying.
The temptation is just all around you, especially in times when you are down and need to take a load off. This is one of the biggest reasons why this type of relationship won't work. There is no need to torture yourself and try to prolong the process. We understand that you guys love each other, but sometimes you just have to know when to cut your losses.
There are just way too many communication issues.
One of the most difficult aspects of such a relationship is communication. Each of you is on a separate schedule and you may even have partners that are overseas. Just organizing a proper time and date to speak to each other can be difficult.
You attempt to use all the forms of communication, such as phone, texts, social media, etc. in order to make up for the little face time you guys will actually experience. This can prove to be quite a burden as none of your forms or communication can actually provide an adequate substitute for personal face-to-face communication.
Paranoia from false assumptions.
Because you are not in reach of your partner, it is very difficult to not let your mind wander. Although you guys have been texting all night and you both agree to stay in, you never really know what the other person is doing. You girlfriend could easily be texting you that she is at home hanging out with friends watching a movie meanwhile she just arrived at a frat party, just waiting to get double teamed by some Greek Life Legends.
Although this may not be the case, one can only imagine. You are not actually with your partner, so you can never know what he or she is actually doing. This paranoia should be enough of a reason to end your relationship. Just because he hasn't texted you back in 30 minutes, your mind can force you to think that he might currently be in bed, giving some other girl the business. No matter how much you trust them, your mind always tends to make the worst assumptions and this can drive anyone crazy.
You finally realize all this effort isn't worth it.
In the first few months of your long distance relationship, you are truly blinded by love. At this point, you will say and do anything to keep the relationship going. This requires an immense amount of effort and coordination. Most of the time, all your efforts are in vain as there is no reward for you. While some may be content with having no sex in their relationship, this mindset is extremely difficult to maintain throughout your whole experience.
Towards the latter parts of this relationship, you will begin to question the amount of effort such a relationship takes to operate. You begin to question whether the effort was really worth it. While it may seem great early on, the longer you endure it, the more you realize the taxing effect this has on the mind and the body.