Sexual purgatory, better known as the friend zone, is every man's worst nightmare. At one point and time in your life, you will be friend zoned by a chick that you really want to sleep with. This usually happens when she mistakes your kindness for you just wanting to be friends.
In such an instance, both parties are mistaken: the man for being soft and not letting his true intentions be known and the woman for thinking this man is nice to her solely to be her friend. No matter how great a girl might be as a friend, being stuck in the friend zone when you want it to be more isn't something to write home about. Keep your eyes on the prize, young fella.
if you spend too much time talking to her and being friendly, you're taking your mind off the true objective. Sure, if you only want to be her friend, it's all well and good, but if you want to be more, you have to demonstrate this intention outright.
This is a social investment and every hour you spend talking about her exes or watching movies without getting some is a loss on your investment. Once you sense you've been put in the friend zone, you can either continue to be a good friend and understand that nothing you do will get you action or you can just cut your losses and move on.
You actually sit and watch full movies with her.
When you're trying to woo a woman, you might suggest watching a movie at home in your apartment in hopes of it leading to sex either during or after the movie. If you find yourself watching a whole movie just so you guys can talk about it afterwards, then you're probably in the friend zone. You might as well watch the movie alone.
You get drinks with her at happy hour.
There is a proper time to get drinks with a friend and a proper time to get drinks with someone you're trying to sleep with. Should you find yourself constantly going to happy hour with a particular girl -- then you have landed yourself in the friend zone.
It is rare that she is going to give it up to you after happy hour because she's probably just priming herself for dinner with another dude that she keeps mentioning to you.
You either walk her dog or babysit her cat.
If you're taking care of her pets and she is not giving you anything in return, you're probably either a veterinarian or in the friend zone. While she makes for a great friend, you definitely want it to progress further. Some men will go to extreme measures just to get a girl, but if you notice yourself pet-sitting with no action involved, you're probably never escaping that sexual limbo.
She's excited to have you meet her friends and introduces you as "her friend"
"This is my friend, (insert your name here)"… is something that no man wants to hear from a girl he is trying to sleep with. This, for sure, means that you are in the friend zone and all your chances to court your mate are flushed down the drain.
She has obviously told her friends about you, but not in the way that you were thinking -- so just accept the fact that you have been friend zoned.
She asks for you opinion on the clothes she's buying.
Now not every girl is going to sleep with you on the first date; however, what this girl wants from you is probably evident from the activities she asks you to participate in.
If she constantly begs you to go shopping with her and asks for your opinion on clothes, then there is little chance of action in your forecast. Her gay best friend will get more than you would and it is almost certain that you are giving your opinion on outfits she is going to wear on dates with another man.
She gets comfortable mentioning the names of other men she's slept with around you.
For the most part, a girl will not bring up other men she has slept with when talking to a man she is planning on dating or sleeping with. There should be no reason she mentions other dudes' names around you... unless you are in the friend zone.
None of this information is pertinent to you as you couldn't care less who she's been sleeping with if it doesn't include you. Now that you're in the friend zone, have fun listening to all the men she's slept with.
She tells you that you're the type of guy she would marry.
For some reason, marriage and dating don't go together for some people. Just because she said she would marry you doesn't mean she would date you now. Once you hear her describe you in such a manner, know that you have secured a warm seat in the friend zone.
You have all the qualities of someone she would marry, but not someone she wants to sleep with currently -- tough luck for you. Good luck in the friend zone.
You find yourself consoling her through a breakup.
No advice like friendly advice, right? It is great that you are easy to talk to and people can look to you for advice. However, there is a time and place for that, talking about relationships is common amongst people our age. There's no reason the girl you want to sleep with should be reaching out to you for dating advice -- that is unless you've made your intentions unclear and lost sight of your goal.
You've had dinner at her house, but never ate her box.
Dinner dates are loads of fun. What can be better than staying in your apartment, cooking for a girl you like, having some drinks, then getting it on? Seems like the perfect scenario... unless she decides to have her meal and just dip. After that meal you best believe you should be getting some dessert, if you're not chowing her down then you definitely did something wrong.
You didn't have sex on the first date
Life is a game of percentages, and if you haven't slept with this girl the first night you met, the chances of you being friend zoned drastically increase.
Of course, all women have sex at different times in the dating process, but if you don't successfully invite this woman to your bed on the night you met her, she may stop thinking about you sexually. And that, young fella, is your ticket to sexual purgatory.
Top Photo Courtesy: Healthy and Beloved