44 Unexpected, Life-Changing Things I Learned From Being A Sex Writer

By Gigi Engle
Helen Rushbrook

When you think of a sex writer, you probably think of Carrie Bradshaw or some over-sexed vixen who has sex like a porn actress and regularly attends tantric sex parties.

Sure, there is some sex party attendance (mostly as an observer) and yes, there are a LOT of sex toys. But a sex writer is just a regular person doing a job. It's a really cool job, but it doesn't completely take over your life like one might imagine.

Being a sex writer has been a crazy, wonderful and eye-opening experience. There is nothing quite like a career in human sexuality.

Just yesterday I laid out my collection of rogue butt plugs and offered them as going away presents to my co-workers. I'm sure this would be shocking to most people, but for a sex writer, it's all in a day's work. Being a sex writer is an experience I wouldn't trade for the world.

Blair Thill

Here are 44 things I've learned while being a sex writer:

1. People love to tell you personal shit about their sex lives.

2. Many people will think you're an overly sexual person who is into BDSM and sex parties.

3. You will meet some of the coolest people on earth.

4. Your co-workers will become your best friends.

5. Everyone will ask you for sex advice.

6. PR people will send you every kind of butt plug and vibrator on the market. They will send these to your office.

7. And your desk will be covered in sex toys.

8. You may start using a feather tickler as a means to de-stress at your desk during particularly challenging workdays.

9. Your Editor-in-Chief will not let you use the term “hair pie” in an article.

10. People will assume you know a lot more than you do.

11. Sex will become the topic you feel most comfortable discussing. Some people have books, pop culture and history. You have sex.

12. Men will ask you inappropriate questions. And so will women.

13. You'll get used to oversharing very quickly.

14. Your boyfriend will not understand your job.

15. Your boyfriend will love the sex toy presents, but will hate being written about.

16. Explaining what you do to your parent's friends is awkward at first, but you'll get used to it.

17. People comparing you to Carrie Bradshaw becomes very annoying, very fast.

18. You get emails from disgusting men soliciting you for sex. No, you should not respond to these emails.

19. You learn to laugh at the internet trolls. They are sad, sad people.

20. You also learn never to read the comments on your articles because people are cruel and often insane.

21. You understand the importance of being true to yourself.

22. You never compromise your values.

23. You stop being afraid of what other people think and you stop giving a shit.

24. You start wanting to teach people about sex and make them feel less alone.

25. You definitely have more sex toys than shoes.

26. You get invited to a lot of cool sex toy parities, and pretty soon, you know everyone at these parties.

27. Within in months you will know everything there is to know about the vagina.

28. And the penis.

29. And the ball sack.

30. And the anus.

31. And you will know how to pleasure these areas, as well.

32. You get to make original GIFs of ball sacks, too.

33. You become a favorite at birthdays and bachelorette parities because you always bring the best gifts. Trust me, you'll never miss an invite once you give away a Hitachi Magic Wand and change someone's life forever.

34. You will know literally everything there is to know about lube.

35. You might start an advice column and suddenly have hundreds of people writing you letters. This is really amazing.

Celine Rahman

36. You learn the true meaning of feminism. You learn that you NEED feminism.

37. Yes, you will get better in bed.

38. You stop having a filter.

39. At some point, your editors will stop being shocked by the shit you say. But maybe not.

40. You'll love being at work.

41. You'll adore every minute of everything you write.

42. You will be grateful you didn't go into PR like your mom said you should.

43. You'll be ready for whatever life throws at you.

44. You'll be a stronger woman after this experience.

Yours in lust, XOXO Auntie Gigi

Be sure to sign up for Gigi's newsletter for the latest in love and sex.