People Reveal The Reason Their Last Relationship Ended

By
Share
Ad failed to load

Welcome to the Ex Games: a content series about love lost. Whether it's the realization things need to end, the act of rejection, the reality of being single, or the resurrection that is moving on, the Ex Games has every stage of a breakup covered.

And to really bring these stories to life, we've launched the Ex Games podcast, where we delve into the two sides of a break-up story with a new couple each week, and aim to end up somewhere near the truth. Because when it comes to affairs of the heart, everyone plays, but does anyone win? Let's find out. 

Ad failed to load

Breaking up: Even the sound of it is earth-shattering. Like you were once whole and now you're splintered, with little fissures and cracks, crumbling into nothingness.

And, perhaps initially, that's what it feels like. So much of your life was lived in tandem. Now the mundane tasks that brought you together, like grocery shopping or watching Netflix, feel almost incomplete or the tiniest bit off without the other person.

Yet, as painful as breakups are, nearly everyone has experienced them in one form or another. And there's something comforting in that, in knowing that as tough as your breakup is – whether it's after 20 years, eight months, or three weeks – someone out there knows your struggle.

Ad failed to load

Whether we like them or not (we generally don't), breakups are learning experiences. They teach us who we are in relationships, how we make compromises, what we want, and what we don't.

As psychologist Dr. LeslieBeth Wish confirms to Elite Daily, “It's important to keep alive the self-knowledge gained about your relationship. We all can benefit from understanding the key component of: Why did I choose this person when I did – and why did we break up?”

Knowing what tore a union apart can be painful; it can force you to realize truths about yourself and your partner that you never wanted to know. But that's necessary, in order to avoid falling into unhealthy relationship patterns. That's why we have to study what went wrong; this is how we learn from our mistakes.

Ad failed to load

We surveyed 100 people and asked them to detail how their last breakup went down in one sentence. Yes, of course, several of the responses we got were run-ons, but the overall ethos of the piece is that breakups are messy and complicated, but they generally happen for a reason.

And when it really boils down, all it takes is one sentence to realize why things just weren't right.

Here are 100 people's truncated, but truthful reasons their last relationship ended. I even put them in a word cloud:

Ad failed to load

1. “I was in love with him, he was in love with his ex.” - Arielle, 22

2. “We were too young.” - Jess, 26

Ad failed to load

3. “He thought I was cheating (I wasn't), so he made up an elaborate lie to try and manipulate me into admitting I was, and I dumped him because of it.” - Anonymous, 24

4. “She was scared of real commitment.” - Laura, 28

5. “He was married.” - Anonymous, 27

Ad failed to load

6. “The physical chemistry was great, but after a year, the emotional chemistry never caught up.” - Anonymous, 22

7. “My ex wanted to quit his full time job and become a professional wrestler.” - Anonymous, 26

8. “We were too immature to handle being in love, so we ended up making each other the worst versions of ourselves.” - Aoife, 23

Ad failed to load

9. “She was a cheater.” - Nicholas, 28

10. “He was having an online relationship with someone across the country.” - Montana, 25

Ad failed to load

11. “We're both real f*cked up.” - Jimbo, 24

12. “No one should knowingly marry a sex addict who also happens to be a compulsive liar.” - Anonymous, 26

13. “He decided that religion was more important than what was right in front of him.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

14. “He wasn't sure about me.” - Alexia, 23

15. “I wanted to be appreciated for who I am, but my adventurous spirit, inquisitive nature, and general lack of Lilly Pulitzer clothing were too much for his family to handle, so I moved on.” - Meg, 30

16. “She decided to find something better.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

17. “I didn't really like her but I stayed.” - Janette, 25

18. “He was sleeping with my 'best friend.'” - Lauren, 21

19. “He decided we were too different after almost five years of dating and after I moved to a new city for him... then he up moved away and had a new girlfriend in three weeks.” - Samantha, 22

Ad failed to load

20. “I didn't realize I was being abusive.” - Ashley, 19

21. “Cheating, lying, and distance.” - Rose, 27

Ad failed to load

22. “She stopped loving me.” - Anonymous, 28

23. “We should never have been dating in the first place, and would have broken up years sooner if we had ever actually lived in the same city.” - Julie, 25

24. “He wasn't nice to me.” - Sean, 24

Ad failed to load

25. “He told me that when he went to sleep he still loved me, and when he woke up, he didn't. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯” - Anonymous

26. “I was 'too emotional.'” - Amanda, 25

27. “He let me know that he was not over his ex, that he still loved her and always would, and asked, 'So, are we done here?'” - Amy, 28

Ad failed to load

28. “It was a long distance relationship, neither of us was willing to change where we live.” - Nehar, 21

29. “Unmotivated.” - Leigh, 26

30. “Alcohol.” - Anonymous, 27

Ad failed to load

31. “He wanted to pursue his music and didn't have time for a girlfriend.” - Jen, 34

32. “It had become a therapist/patient relationship rather than a love relationship.” - Ricardo, 25

Ad failed to load

33. “There was no future.” - Sarah, 26

34. "My ex-girlfriend took me for granted.” - Evan, 27

35. “He cheated on me with my then-best friend, who was supposed to be my college roommate, tried to deny it, and then my ex-best friend tried to fight me in a frat house basement.” - Danielle, 25

Ad failed to load

36. “She didn't feel we were emotionally compatible, and that I was too "passionate" for her.” - Anonymous, 26

37. “He fell in love with his next door neighbor.” - Ariel, 25

38. “She was abusive and obsessed with me.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

39. “We didn't want the same things in life.” - Brian, 25

40. “He told me he needed to be celibate for a while.” - Anonymous, 36

Ad failed to load

41. “CHEATING CHEATER.” - Mariel, 24

42. “Disappeared (AGAIN) for three weeks, turned off phone and wouldn't reply to email, wouldn't say what was wrong when we finally talked.” - Anonymous, 28

43. “Told boyfriend that if he just wanted to 'date' forever that we should break up and he said "of course I want more than that!" but 6 months later he dumped me” - Bridget, 33

Ad failed to load

44. “He wasn't ready for a serious relationship.” - Anonymous, 24

45. “It was long distance and he wasn't being communicative enough.” - Alexandra, 25

46. “She cheated with a good friend of mine.” - S., 27

Ad failed to load

47. “He loved me and I didn't love him back.” - Anonymous

48. “He dumped me and didn't realize how good he had it till he hooked up with crazy and I was left with crippling panic attacks.” - Sarah, 23

49. “She said our aspirations weren't compatible.” - Satta, 28

Ad failed to load

50. “All my friends and family hated him and he didn't think that was a problem.” - Julie, 23

51. “We weren't compatible because we wanted completely different things in life.” - Talia, 25

Ad failed to load

52. “It wasn't the man I saw myself marrying.” - Anonymous

53. “I don't know, he suddenly blocked me after a month of dating right when we were supposed to go away for Memorial Day!” - Anonymous

54. “Neglect on my part during an extended separation.” - Ahmed, 24

Ad failed to load

55. “I felt too insecure in the relationship, I always felt like I put in more effort and care, and he didn't do enough to show me that I was important to him.” - Anonymous, 24

56. “I wanted to hang out with my friends more than I wanted to hang out with him.” - Anonymous, 23

57. “The long distance became intolerable and because of it I realized what a d*ck he was.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

58. “Our age difference.” - Anonymous, 26

59. “He got another girlfriend!” - Anonymous, 30

60. “We were married and she cheated.” - Peter, 31

Ad failed to load

61. “Lying/cheating/sociopathic/narcissistic.” - Anonymous

62. “He just walked out.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

63. “Realized he wasn't someone I could spend the rest of my life with.” - Michelle, 28

64. “After four months of seeing each other and sleeping together several time a week, he had still only stayed the night with me twice, and reluctantly; he was 37 and I was 31.” - Caroline, 33

65. “He always needed to have control and was an emotional abuser; I wish everyone he's dated knew this.” - Anonymous, 25

Ad failed to load

66. “I was no longer in love with him, I just loved him as my best friend.” - Liz, 22

67. “I felt that the relationship was not growing any longer and becoming stagnant, so I decided to go our separate ways after six years.” - Madison

68. “Lying, cheating, and jealousy ruled my life.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

69. “Different future plans.” - Laura, 26

70. “He was a child.” - Alex, 24

Ad failed to load

71. “Religious differences seem more important when you graduate from college.” - Anonymous, 26

72. “I began to feel taken for granted and felt I deserved to feel adored once in a while.” - Anonymous, 26

73. “The Egyptian military.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

74. “He cheated.” - Anonymous

75. “We f*cked up a good thing.” - Jonathan, 28

76. “She moved to Washington DC without a job lined up and I was the stable one in NYC.” - Alex, 29

Ad failed to load

77. “He wanted to be monogamous, get married, and have kids with someone.” - Alicia, 36

78. “I lost myself.” - Anonymous

79. “He didn't have enough time for me because he's in a band.” - Jane, 21

Ad failed to load

80. “She was narcissistic and incapable of love.” - Anonymous

81. “I tried to go in for round two of the night... he told me I should probably just go home” - Anonymous, 24

Ad failed to load

82. “He wasn't ready.” - Jessika, 24

83. “We couldn't find a shared reality.” - Anonymous, 24

84. “Poor communication coupled with mental health issues makes for bad relationships.” - James, 25

Ad failed to load

85. “Cheating.” - Anonymous

86. “He was unmotivated/stagnant in life, while I was growing and moving forward.” - Tara, 26

87. “It ended because of jealousy and a lack of communication.” - Anonymous, 27

Ad failed to load

88. “We couldn't agree on what we wanted for the future.” - Erika, 30

89. “We didn't want the same things.” - Anonymous

90. “I caught feelings, and he needed to come out as gay.” - Laura, 23

Ad failed to load

91. “Never the "right time," too afraid to bring our relationship to daylight.” - Kelly, 22

92.“I wanted to kill myself; he wasn't ready for a relationship.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

93. “Lack of affection.” - Anonymous

94. “He cheated on me and was talking to other girls while still with me.” - Christina, 25

95. “He was immature.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

96. “I grew out of what I used to like about my SO and found our needs from the relationship to no longer match.” - Anonymous

97. “He loved someone else.” - Anonymous

98. “He was a stage-5 clinger!” - Liz, 22

Ad failed to load

99. “Moved to different places for work.” - Anonymous, 24

100. “The realization I was never going to get the love or respect I deserve.” - Anonymous

Ad failed to load

Must Reads

5 Trends From The '90s Are Making A Serious Comeback, So Somebody Page Cher Horowitz

I was born in the '90s and my childhood was one Caboodles train case packed with scrunchies and butterfly clips after another. If you could believe it, early '90s fashion is already considered vintage (I officially feel old AF) and according to sprin…
By Stephanie Montes

This New Snapchat Feature Is Going To Make Your Stories Look Even Better

Giphy is officially taking over social media, and I'm not upset about it. After invading Instagram stories with funny animated stickers, the company partnered with Snapchat — and now, we're finally able to fill our Snaps with hilarious GIFs. In other…
By Amanda Fama

Your Weekly Horoscope Is Here & Luckily, It's All Good Things

Pat yourself on the back because you survived not only one but two major eclipses. The last few weeks have been one obstacle after another but you made it. You dealt with the pain, held it together, and prevailed. Now, your February 19, 2018 weekly h…
By Roya Backlund

6 Subtle Red Flags That Could Mean You’re Sleeping Way Too Much

Have you ever woken up after an unusually long night of sleep and felt, well, kind of awful? Whether you roll out of bed feeling super dehydrated, nursing a throbbing a headache, or you simply feel stiff as a board, there are reasons why your body mi…
By Annakeara Stinson

These 6 Workouts Can Be Done Right On Your Couch, & Yes, They Do Count As Exercise

Ever have that feeling when you're watching the Olympics like you should be working out, or at least stretching, but in reality you're just laying around eating chips? Yeah, me neither. But if you do ever feel that pull to work out when you're just l…
By Annakeara Stinson

10 Things You Should Say To Your Partner Every Day To Keep The Love Alive

When it coms to love, falling into it is a lot easier than maintaining it. There’s a reason, after all, that it's called "falling" in love, because it's mostly out of your control — the heart just takes over. Because those emotions come so easily and…
By Rachel Shatto

Science Says These 8 Foods Can Help You Live Longer, So Eat Up

If you're looking to live forever, or at least for an appropriately long amount of time, then the best way to get started on your journey toward immortality is to think about what you're putting into your body for fuel. Think of your diet as the batt…
By Caroline Burke

I Live In London & When Guys Find Out I'm American, They Only See Me As A Fling

I first entered the world of dating apps during a semester abroad in London, and I had zero idea what I was getting myself into. I was 21, had only ever dated boys I'd met through work, school, or mutual friends, and my appreciation for romantic come…
By Genevieve Wheeler

Here's Exactly How You'll Fall In Love, Based On Your Astrological Sign

One of my favorite things about learning about my zodiac sign and others' is learning patterns about my behavior that I can acknowledge and use to my advantage. As a Scorpio sun sign, I know I'm typically described as mysterious, drawn to loyal peopl…
By Elana Rubin

These 8 Red Flags Might Mean You're Pushing Yourself Too Hard In Your Workouts

If you live by the motto "no pain, no gain," or you frequently exclaim that your HIIT circuits "hurt so good," you're probably the type of person who challenges yourself to the max during your workouts. And while this isn't necessarily a bad thing, i…
By Georgina Berbari

I Tried Vegan "Spacepaste" & It Looks Like Straight-Up LED Lights On Your Face

As you might have noticed, 2018 is the year for glitter. So many brands have been releasing shining, shimmering formulations like they're going out of style. We're not even halfway through February, and Lemonhead LA has already launched the best glit…
By Kim Carpluk

These "Awkward" Proposal Stories Show There's No One Perfect Way To Get Engaged

There are a few adjectives people use to describe proposal stories that tend to be a bit more common than the rest. You know what I mean. How many times have you heard someone describe their marriage proposal as "magical" or "romantic" or — my person…
By Candice Jalili

This $20 Toy Simulates Pimple Popping, So You Can Save Your Face (But Still Lose Your Dignity)

As a self-proclaimed popaholic, I am not ashamed to admit that I love watching pimple popping and blackhead extraction videos. Call me gross, but I find it immensely therapeutic and satisfying. To all of my fellow weirdos, we’ve been blessed with a n…
By Ariana Marsh

Everyone Is So Thirsty Over This “Photo” Of Obama With Facial Hair

It's been a hot minute since President Barack Obama left the Oval office (though it feels like ages), and a lot of us miss him dearly. After leaving the White House, the 44th president remained out of the public eye for a little while, decompressing …
By Daniella Bondar

Meghan Markle Uses This $13 Natural Wonder To Grow Her Eyebrows Back & You Can Too

Meghan Markle is the world's new go-to celebrity for all things fashion and beauty — she's marrying a prince after all, so she must have some tricks up her sleeve. Meghan Markle's beauty routine is just as intricate as mine, because that's how real s…
By Alison Turka

7 Foolproof Things To Do Every Day If You're Tired Of Being Lazy AF

Being lazy can be oh-so-lovely. Until you start letting life pass you by, and not living to your full potential, then suddenly, it's not so good anymore. Don't get me wrong, I love my weekends when I can stay snuggled up in bed just a bit longer. Hit…
By Marisa Casciano

This Is How Long Most People Wait To Say "I Love You," Science Says

If I had to choose one word to describe saying "I love you" to your partner for the first time, I'd have to go with... hmm, exciting? Nope. Thrilling? Hardly. Terrifying? YES. Exactly. Saying "I love you" for the first time is terrifying. What makes …
By Candice Jalili

6 Reasons To Travel Abroad With Your Boyfriend Or Girlfriend In Your 20s

Traveling can be many things: hectic, expensive, and definitely stressful. But with the right people or person beside you, all those troubles kind of just melt away. That's why there are some solid reasons to travel abroad with your boyfriend or girl…
By Alani Vargas