A few months ago, you and your best friend made a promise: This would be your year.
You knew a new semester meant a whole new pool of boys to choose from. You promised you'd both meet cute boys before the holidays came around, and you thought you'd have a cute relationship to celebrate come Valentine's Day.
But as the months went by, everyone seemed to be falling in love but you. Your girlfriends reminded you your time would come.
Before you knew it, February 14 came rolling around and you were alone, drinking yourself silly in wine – as I am now – and asking yourself, "How did this happen?"
I know from experience being single on Valentine's Day fucking sucks. We would all love to spend that special day with someone we care about.
We all dream of getting dressed up and having a nice fondue dinner, followed by some romping around in the sack.
Society tends to tell us, as women, that we should spend our time trying to find ourselves a companion. Our families emphasize it even more by asking us what boys we're talking to.
We feel pressure to find some guy who'll put a ring on it. As all our high school friends are getting engaged, married or having babies, we are reminded even more of our impending life spent being the mother of 32 cats.
Although you may not be spending your Valentine's Day the way you pictured it, there are so many things you should celebrate about your special day.
1. You are not single.
Who even made up that label anyway?
Technically, you are not in a relationship, but you are not single: You have so many people who love you, and you will always have someone there for you.
Even though it may not feel like it right now, you are adored more than you will ever know.
The term "single" should not be a label you carry around. It does not define you. It does not make you any less – or any more – of a person.
2. You are worth everything.
I know it hurts right now. Just because you don't have a man strapped to your side, that doesn't mean you are unloved or unlovable.
I have been through times when I believed just because I didn't have a boyfriend, something was wrong with me.
I told myself it was my fault. It was my looks. Maybe I wasn't pretty enough. Maybe I wasn't tall, smart or funny enough for anyone to love me.
But after several talks with my dear friends, I soon began to realize it wasn't me: It just wasn't my time yet.
I should never love a man who can't adore me just the way I am. A man should in no way ever define your worth as a human being.
You are strong. You are independent. Don't tolerate a man who does not appreciate you, and who does not love your entire heart, with all its cracks and flaws. You are special and unique, and so valuable.
You are a queen. You don't need anyone who thinks otherwise.
3. You will find "the one."
You will not be alone forever: That is a promise.
There's no doubt in my mind somebody will fall in love with you. He will fall in love with your smile, your laugh and the way your hair looks even when you haven't washed it in three days.
He'll love you when you've had too much to drink. He'll love you when you're crying, but also when you're so mad, you're beautiful.
As cheesy and cliched as it sounds, your soulmate is out there. He's living each day waiting for you, and when the time is right, you'll meet him.
Maybe it'll be in class. Maybe it'll be in a coffee shop or at work. It may even be in line at FedEx.
It just takes patience.
4. Love will happen.
Love doesn't come when you want it to: It comes when you least expect it, and when it knows you're ready.
It comes when you're yelling at the Starbucks barista. It comes on your first day of work after college. It comes in small moments no one could ever predict.
Love is not on a schedule. It's random, spontaneous and amazing. It's a firecracker in your belly when he kisses you.
Love is joy and pain and hope and brilliant and horrible. It's a spectacular thing.
5. You're a badass bitch.
If all else fails, know you're a badass bitch. You're a strong, independent woman who doesn't need a man.
Pour yourself a glass of wine, call your best friends and watch a sappy romantic comedy.
So just because you're not necessarily going out, that doesn't mean you can't dress up.
Heck, wear your prom dress. When are you ever going to wear it again, anyway?
Do your makeup. Take a bubble bath. Eat pizza, and order extra cheese.
Call your FWB. Run around your apartment naked. Do something crazy. Find happiness and love in the comfort of your best friends and family.
Valentine's Day is not just about the love between a romantically involved couple; it's also about the love between people. You are so much more loved than you could ever imagine.
You're beautiful, and nobody will ever have the right to make you feel like you aren't. You're amazing.
A version of this post was previously published on the writer's personal blog.