Dating is like a wild whirlwind that sucks you in, and then spits you out. It's been an exciting adventure, to say the least. Over the last few months, I've definitely learned some valuable lessons and had some really fun experiences. Regardless of how cool some of these online guys are, nothing beats meeting someone organically.
I had a mix of meeting guys online, while meeting others in person. Whether through friends, at the local art show, while walking my dog or at the Apple store while waiting for my phone to come back to life, meeting people in person proved to be a thrilling experience.
There is a certain sense of mystery when meeting someone organically. It's all based on attraction and that initial connection.
I don't know where he grew up, what his favorite color is or what he does for work. All I know is that I like something about him. Something is drawing me to him.
That's definitely not a feeling one would easily capture online. Not to mention, the way you feel when initially speaking to this person is very telling. You just know when you're into someone; it's either there, or it's not.
Meeting someone online can sway your feelings because you're walking into this date with preconceived notions. This person probably looks good on paper, which is why you decided to give it a shot in the first place. Because of this, however, you might look past whether an actual connection exists.
Here are the benefits of meeting organically:
1. Automatic Attraction
You see him from across the room. "Hello, mister hottie with a body! How you doin'?" You just know. You dig this person, or you don't. It's there, or it's not.
2. Not Just A Picture
You're not just a face on a screen. You're not a random stranger sending messages on the other side of the text box. When meeting organically, you are a real person. With this comes a pre-established sense of respect and kindness. I dig it and have no complaints.
3. No Pressure
When meeting naturally, the pressure is lifted. Planning a “date” via online apps allows people to put their best faces on.
When I met the hot guy while walking my dog, I was in yoga pants, had my hair up and was not wearing any makeup. There was no façade, no mask, no pressure and no prep. It was just me. Crossing paths naturally makes things comfortable and easy.
4. Common Interests
You met this person because you were doing something similar, hence you have an already existing connection. This can be a reason to hang out again, and it will definitely give you something to talk about. Whether it be having a mutual friend, being interested in art or having gone to the same college, there's a link.
5. Exciting Sense Of The Unknown
So, who is this guy? I wonder what he does and where he lives. Rather than learning about this person via an online profile, you get to ask him in person. Hooray!
Not knowing what to expect can be really fun, and it allows room for extensive conversations about values, culture, etc. It's a great way to discover if you and this person are actually compatible. There's nothing more exciting than learning about another person all while shooting the sh*t and hanging out.
6. Friend Zone
If worst comes to worst, you can always be friends. When you meet someone organically, the set expectation of going on a “date” doesn't exist.
If you hang out and ~the feels~ aren't there, the awkward “let's just be friends” talk does not need to be had. You started as friends, and nothing needs to change.
Above all, meeting someone organically is a lot safer than meeting someone online. People can be super sketchy, and I have heard some serious horror stories. With that “link” in place, there is an added sense of safety and basic trust.
Bottom line, meeting organically is cool. Don't forget to say hi to the next hottie you cross paths with.