When you’re in a relationship with someone, I’d argue there’s nothing better than seeing their name pop up on your phone. Instant butterflies. OK, OK, I admit — maybe I’m biased because I’m in a long-distance relationship right now, so texting is basically foreplay for me. But there’s something heartwarming about receiving a carefully crafted message tailored specifically for you. If you’re looking to romance your honey with the modern version of a love letter, consider writing a long, sweet text message to send to your boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner.
There’s a reason why it feels so thrilling to receive a love-filled text, and according to licensed marriage family and therapist Mary Kay Cocharo, it comes down to neurochemicals. She previously told Elite Daily that novel experiences — like getting a long, sweet text from your partner when you least expect it — can trigger a release of dopamine and endorphins in your system. The effect will be extra special if they say something new, different, or more sentimental than their usual text message.
When you get that notification on your phone from your SO, the ping unleashes a surge of feel-good chemicals that can make you feel like you’re literally floating on cloud nine. If you want to keep your romance strong, Cocharo recommends sending sweet texts at the beginning of your relationship when everything is fresh and exciting — but of course, you’re encouraged to send them throughout the relationship, too!
Sending these texts will make your SO (and their phone) buzz with excitement. If you want to let them know how much they *really* mean to you, look no further than this flirty guide for inspo.
1. Our last date was so amazing. I can’t stop replaying all of the highlights from that day — your infectious laugh, the fun memories we made, and our adventures together. I can’t contain my happiness when I think about us. I can’t wait to be with you and cuddle you soon. Until then ❤️🔥
2. I wanted to send you a little message to say hi. I just passed by [insert place you visited together] and started thinking of you and the sweet times we had together. I really cherish our memories, baby... that day was beyond special. I’ve been in such a great mood all afternoon because you’re on my mind 👉🏻👈🏻 Hope you’re having a wonderful day.
3. I saw this meme and it made me laugh 🤣 I thought of [insert inside joke] and how much I laugh around you. Remember when [insert memory]? I hope this brought a smile to your face… kinda like how you always make me smile.
4. I found this picture of us — You are so [handsome/beautiful]. I love how cute and happy we look. [Add funny inside joke here.] Hopefully it perks up your day. I know it totally made me reminisce about our past memories 🥰 I’m thinking of you. I just wanted to say hi and share something that made me happy.
5. Check out this news article about [insert topic you spoke about recently here.] Isn’t it so fascinating? 🤔 As soon as I saw it, I knew I had to send it to you right away for your thoughts. I love the way you think about things and I’m curious about your opinion. Looking forward to talking about this later with you... clothes optional.
6. Good morning, baby. I had the sweetest dream about you and it started my day on the *best* note. Wish you were with me right now. I’m yearning for your touch and mouth... I can’t wait for undivided time with you later. No distractions.
7. I really miss you. I hope [insert business trip, vacation, time away] is going well and you’re having a nice time. Hurry back to me! I’m waiting for cuddles and to kiss your face all over.
8. I know we just saw each other, but I seriously can’t get enough of you. It made me so sad leaving you last time. Love doesn’t even begin to describe it. Thinking of your voice and how happy you make me is getting me through the week. One day closer to seeing you. The countdown begins... xoxo.
9. Thank you for being there for me. It makes me happy to know that you’re there for me and I can count on you for the little (and big) things. It means the world to me and I just wanted to express gratitude for how incredible you are as a partner.
10. You mean a lot to me ❤️ I’m so lucky you’re mine and I’m yours. You bring so much joy to my life, baby, and I want to bring the same light and magic to yours. You deserve it.
11. Popping in with a quick message to say hi! I remember you told me you had [insert school or work project] today. How did it go?! I know you totally rocked it, and I’m so proud of you for getting it done. Call me when you’re free to tell me how it went. I want to hear all about it!
In my professional experience as a relationship coach, when you’re writing messages to your partner, it’s better to be specific, authentic, and uninhibited with your feelings. It brings you closer to your partner and cultivates desire during the times you aren’t together — plus, sweet texts can help build erotic anticipation.
You can totally copy and paste the templates above, but I encourage you to use the text ideas as a starting point, then make them your own. Add in some cute, unique details about your partner and give the message a little “oomph” with some pictures, memes, songs, or all of the above. The details will show that you’re paying attention and it’ll make your partner feel extra special.
Mary Kay Cocharo, licensed marriage family and therapist