Moving On To Someone New Isn't Always The Best Way To Get Over A Breakup

by Marissa Mariotti

We’ve all been there: You just got out of a serious relationship and the thought of being alone terrifies you. You sign up for every dating app out there and make sure to look your absolute best each time you step out of the house. You never know who you’re going to meet, right?

However, during this time, it's imperative for us to be alone so we can learn about ourselves.

My rebound came shortly after the end of a three-year relationship, and it certainly served its purpose in temporarily making me forget about my ex. When my rebound was over, however, the pain of the original breakup was that much more difficult to deal with.

I had a lot of time to myself to reflect on the decisions I made during my three-year relationship,and those I made during my rebound. It was only after both were over that I realized there was something important I could learn from my rebound.

Now I’m not saying that everyone should get into a rebound relationship because it teaches valuable information and insight you would not otherwise find; I’m just saying that if you happen to find yourself with a rebound, there is a lot that can be learned from it.

Don’t Give Just Anyone A Chance

You may be lonely, but the first person who comes along may not be worthy of your time.

Don’t allow this person to be part of your life simply because he is paying attention to you; this will only potentially lead to more hurt. It’s best not to rush into anything simply because it is convenient at the time. It’s better to be alone than to be with the wrong person.

Trust Your Gut

If something doesn’t feel right to you, whether you think your partner is being unfaithful, or things aren't playing out the way you envisioned, listen to your instincts.

Most of the time your gut feeling will be right. Don’t doubt yourself because you are afraid you are overreacting; learn to trust yourself.

Don’t Settle Because He Is “Nice

First of all, every guy is nice when you first meet him. No one who is interested in you will be a jerk right off the bat; it may not reveal itself until later.

Most importantly, possessing the quality of being nice should not be a far-fetched idea. It should be the bare minimum that you expect from someone.

I find that girls settle for so much less than they deserve these days, and a nice guy should not be someone that is beyond your imagination.

Your Girlfriends Will Provide All The Support You Need

From day one of a breakup, your best friends will be by your side. They will tell you what a loser your ex is and how you should take this time to be alone. It may be hard to hear and you may not be able to listen to their advice right away, but in the end, you will realize your friends were right.

I learn everything the hard way; this breakup was no exception. Five months down the road and after another relationship ended, I realized that everything my friends had told me was true.

The great thing about friends is that they will always be there, whether you choose to listen to them right away or learn on your own. That is why they are your best friends. I don’t know where I would be without mine.

Photo via Favim