Of course we know we can't change a guy, but the fact has never stopped many of us ladies from trying.
Many women have been socialized to just stick with a guy, work with him while he shamelessly exhibits problematic flaws and just be content to "get chose."
We often tell ourselves that he "has great potential" and we fall in love with who we know the guy can be instead of who we see in front of us in the moment.
It's not the healthiest mentality, but that's what happens when you're dealing with internalized misogyny... and when you're just plain punch drunk in love.
But these thoughts should sober you up.
Here are a few signs the crush you've been holding out for will never get it together. It's time to admit to yourself what's really going on, and kick him to the curb.
1. His job situation sucks and it's all his fault.
Having a little bad luck in the job department can happen to the best of us, but if your guy is always quitting for trivial reasons or getting fired for serious ones— red flag on the play, babe.
2. You can count on your fingers how many times he's apologized.
3. He's in the same place in life he was in when you first met.
4. His own loved ones warn you to run.
5. He's controlling.
6. He has no bank account and says he "doesn't believe in credit."
7. He forgot your birthday, and it isn't his first time.
If ever there were a clear sign that he doesn't GAF, this is it, darling.
8. He constantly asks you for money.
9. He's a chronic liar.
10. He never asks you how you are doing.
11. All of his friends are falling off the face of the earth.
12. He's constantly in trouble with the law.
13. His remedy for arguments has always been to walk away.
14. He's a habitual cheater.
Not only is playboy not being faithful to you, but he's also likely exposing you to all kinds of diseases. Bleh. Don't let this fuck boy play with your heart, your vagina or your life.
15. He disrespects your friends and/or parents.
16. He never follows through on anything.
17. He thinks sex requires his pleasure and only your presence.
Sex isn't everything, but it damn sure is something. This guy acts like pleasing you while enjoying himself isn't a possibility. Break up with this selfish clown and get you somebody who can do both.
18. He doesn't respect his own parents.
19.You can only ever count on him to be late.
20. He's abusive.
There are some things most men would never tolerate from a woman, and they wouldn't think twice about a breakup if she ever ventured over into Red Flag land.
Ladies, let's serve ourselves a little more, draw our lines a lot more carefully and do so without apology.