OK, so your hookup buddy liked you enough to be exclusive. Then, he liked you enough to ask you to be his girlfriend. THEN, he loved you enough to propose, marry you, give you babies and love you for the rest of your life!
But at death did you two part, and that mofo peaced out. SMH. Love — so fickle.
If you want to know if your bae REALLY loves you as much as he says he does, though, put him to the test and ask him if he'd be willing to swap hearts with you after you both die.
And by "swap hearts," I really do mean both of you literally have your hearts ripped out of your own chests and placed inside each other's coffins so you could be ~one~ forever.
Where did I get such a crazy idea, you ask? Well, from HISTORY. Yep, a medieval couple actually did this.
When Louise de Quengo died seven years after her husband in 1656 at the age of 65, she was buried with her husband's heart in her grave.
Her husband, Toussaint de Perrien, "a patron of religious orders in Brittany, France," had his heart literally cut out of his chest and placed into a heart-shaped urn after he died. Then, the urn was taken 125 miles away from his own grave and over to his wife's coffin when she died.
Louise de Quengo herself was found with her body opened and her heart also removed after death.
While we can hope (and probably fairly assume) her intention was for her heart to rest with her husband, her heart has not actually been found.
Turns out, this couple wasn't the only one to undergo "postmortem heart removal."
In fact, Live Science reported that after analyzing almost 6,000 partial skeletons and almost 500 full ones, scientists found 35 of the full and partial remains had been opened after death.
And some of these bodies had even had the hearts removed.
The researchers wrote that this removal of hearts was likely "for couples to be reunited in death."
All right, now, it's time to text your BF and ask him if he would rip his heart out and leave it for you to put in your grave when you die.
If he says no, the obvious, logical next step is to dump him.