I just met one of the nice guys everyone is always talking about.
I've heard all about the nice guys. No girl gives them the time of day because they're “too nice." Quite honestly, that girl is me. So I haven't figured out why it is I've kept this guy around for so long.
I've had my heart broken too many times for me to be able to trust men, even the nice ones. This is uncharted territory for me.
With that being said, there are a few things I want to tell the nice guy who's attempting to date me:
1. I'm not used to hearing so many compliments.
Most (if not all) of the men I have dated in my past would give me backhanded compliments nearly every time they spoke to me. You know, “Wow, that dress makes your stomach look pretty small” or “Hey, I noticed you didn't eat so much tonight. I see you noticed you could lose some weight, too. Good start!”
So, for all of those “Good morning, beautiful” texts or the ever so frequent “You're so gorgeous” lines you say to my face… thank you. Just know they are appreciated (from time-to-time), but I have never been taught that a woman my size could ever fit into the definition of beautiful.
2. I'm overwhelmed when you try talking to me every second of the day.
One of the biggest things I need you to understand is that, up until this point, I have had to fight for any man's attention. I had to learn to be OK with not talking to the person I was seeing because they would be too busy to ask how my day was.
I learned to be OK on my own and never depend on someone else for my happiness. I had to protect my own happiness because they would drop it every time.
So, if you find yourself triple texting me because you haven't heard from me in an hour or two, know I received every text and I'm working on replying.
3. I'm never going to trust you.
You're the type of guy to stick with just one girl, and I'm sure that's what you plan on telling me. I'm the only one for you. In my eyes… you're a liar.
In my eyes, you're talking to at least three other women behind my back and I'm not going to be the one to get hurt after it all. I'll always keep my distance, waiting for every single moment you mess up so I can mentally document it and throw it in your face at a later date.
You're no different than every other fuckboy I've fallen for — except, this time, I won't be falling first.
4. I won't easily allow myself to feel for you.
I'm sure I am unlike any other woman you've ever met in your life; you're just so crazy about me. You'll tell me you miss me all of the time, how wonderful of a person I am and how lucky you are to have met me. Thank you, I'm flattered.
But I'm also going to kill all of the butterflies in my stomach the moment they enter; I will ignore all of the sweet things you say to me. I've been hurt too many times in the past to let another man's words get my hopes up.
5. I'm doing the best I can.
You should probably know that the fact I've talked to you for more than three days is basically a record for me already. Not to mention that I haven't gone on Tinder or any other dating app since we started talking... consider yourself the luckiest man on earth.
I am not going to tell you how much I miss you all of the time. I'm not going to compliment you on your boyish good looks. And I'm not going to hand my heart over to you on a silver platter. I've had many years and several fuckboys' worth to build up the walls I have.
It's going to take more than, “Good morning, gorgeous” and a wink my way to make me fall in love.
But I promise you that one day, I will be worth it. [video id="1622606"][/video]