There comes a time in every woman's life where you just have got to CUT THE UNNECESSARY DRAMA.
That means saying buh-bye to all of the lame douchelords you've been messing around with for the better part of your life. They're dragging you down and it's time for you to FLY, my friend.
Thank them for the good times and the embarrassing number of unanswered texts and drunk bathroom cries (Those gave you CHARACTER. No need to regret them.) and MOVE ON. There's too much life left to be livin'!
Here are the 20 guys you have absolutely got to stop wasting your time on if you want even the slightest shot of being happy.
1. The one who can only hang out when it's convenient for him.
You would drop any and every plan just to hang with him, but he'll bail on you for literally anything else.
2. The one who's blatantly in love with someone else.
C'mon. You're better than this. WHY are you putting yourself through this torture?
3. The one who told you he doesn't want anything serious.
So... let me get this straight. He told you he doesn't want anything serious, but you're just sticking around for what?
4. The one who doesn't live where you do and has no intention of moving any time soon.
I'm very unclear on what the happy ending here is supposed to be.
5. The one who consistently chooses his friends over you.
Of course, you don't want a pathetic, whipped loser who drops all of his friends for you, but you want to make sure you're at least on par with his boys.
6. The one who consistently chooses you over his friends.
You want to be with someone who has a sense of loyalty. Odds are his friends have been around for a while.
If he's willing to just completely drop them for some girl (even if it's you and you're AWESOME), we've got a problem here.
7. The one who refuses to be exclusive and also refuses to use condoms.
8. The one who disappears for days on end.
Unless he's a secret agent, you deserve better than this. Honestly, even if he's a secret agent, dump him and find someone with, um, IDK, a NORMAL job.
9. The one who doesn't listen to anything you say.
Do you really want to be with someone who thinks you're so boring, he can't even be bothered with the task of having to listen you?!
10. The one who bores you.
STOP. STOP. STOP. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE STOP IT WITH THIS GUY.
You deserve a fun, happy life filled with great times. Don't waste precious hours of it with someone who makes you so bored, you temporarily forget that you're even alive.
11. The one who's way more into it than you are.
This can be fun at first for the attention, but eventually it just gets old and, honestly, pretty sad for both parties.
12. The one who's all talk and no game.
He tells you how much he likes you, but he never does anything to show him. Stop getting your hopes up for someone who can never live up to them.
13. The one you've secretly been in love with for years.
Either tell him or move on.
14. The one who refuses to introduce you to his friends.
He clearly doesn't want to be part of your world, so don't give him the honor of letting him be part of yours.
15. The one who's never bothered to take you on a date.
He wants to bang you. That's it. And guess what? Eventually, he's going to find someone he wants to bang and take on dates, and he's going to kick you to the curb for her. So stop waiting around for that.
16. The one who booty calls you at four in the morning.
AT LEAST have the decency to call before you start drinking.
17. The one who tells you he loves you... but only when he's drunk.
If he doesn't remember saying it, IT DOESN'T COUNT.
18. The one who you used to be in a relationship with (read: YOUR EX).
You guys broke up for a reason. Accept it and move on.
19. The one who gives you just enough attention to keep you holding on.
You think you're FINALLY about to move on, but then he comes back and sets you right back at square one. NOPE. BYE. Do what you've gotta do to get totally rid of him.
20. The one who always bails on plans last minute.
He doesn't value you or your time. Move on.
Now, of course, for many of us, these are all not separate guys.
Some of us have had the distinct pleasure of being with one guy who was simultaneously boring, an ex and notorious for never listening to you.
The point is, if he possesses any of the traits on this list, LET HIM GO. I promise you can do better.