This week we have Raina* who was ghosted by her boyfriend of five years while they were on vacation for her birthday:
Two years ago, I went to Miami for my birthday weekend with my boyfriend. We were on and off for five years, but we were finally trying to make it work for good and go on our first trip together, alone. There were a few hiccups on our way there. He didn't speak to me the entire flight due to a fear of flying. News to me. We had to wait a while for our room to be ready, so we went spent the day just hanging out and drinking at the bar. We made friends with the bartenders and just had a great time laughing with each other, as we always did.
We got to the room around 4:30 and, since it was our first day, I was excited to go out and have dinner and enjoy the nightlife. So I showered and got ready quickly, and he fell asleep. So I laid in bed with him until, suddenly, it's 11 and he's still not up. Honestly, I huffed and puffed and was less than thrilled. Shoot me. He popped up and got himself dressed and had the audacity to ask me how long it would take me to get ready for dinner. Mind you, I was still in my dress with my hair still done. I said just a few minutes so I can touch up my makeup and maybe fix my bobby pins in my hair. He said he would meet me at the bar. I'm thinking hotel bar. So I walked downstairs and realized he's not there. I text him and said, "Tell me you're at the restaurant bar" and he was. Call me crazy, but if you are on a vacation with your significant other, you wait for them to go to the restaurant together. I was pissed. So I said I'll just stay back and ring in my birthday at the hotel by myself.
Could I have figured out where the restaurant was? Absolutely, but at that point I was so annoyed and turned off by his actions throughout the day. I was just taken aback and upset. So I sat in the room and ordered room service and watched makeover shows on TLC. At 12 am he TEXTS me, "happy birthday Raina" and I didn't answer. At some point, I fell asleep and, around 2/2:30am, I thought I heard him come in. His luggage was right by my bed, so I heard the zipper at some point, half asleep, and I just waited to feel him come into the bed. I wasn't looking to fight then. It would happen in the morning. But then he never came into the bed.
I wasn't looking to fight then. It would happen in the morning. But then he never came into the bed.
I don't know how much time passed, but I shot up and looked for him. I noticed his bag was gone, and I ran into the bathroom and noticed all of his toiletries were gone. I ran to the front door, and he had left it open. You know how you flip that lock down so the door doesn't close all the way? That's what he did.
So he left me in the hotel room alone with the door open, and he disappeared. I was terrified and freaking out. I called him over and over and over, and he never answered. I text him and no answer. I begged for him to come back. No answer.
I text him and no answer. I begged for him to come back. No answer.
I called until maybe 5:30 am when I finally fell asleep from emotional exhaustion. At around 6:30 am, I got a text from him basically saying goodbye to me and that he was leaving me in Miami. On my birthday. By myself.
He was leaving me in Miami. On my birthday. By myself.
I immediately woke up when I heard my phone go off, read it and called him and there was no answer. No response to my texts begging him to please don't do this. Since then, I have not heard from him again. I didn't chase him down when I got back home to NY. I felt so embarrassed and hurt that there was nothing that could be done to make it better. I felt like running after him after he left me in another state as I slept would be so pathetic.
I felt so embarrassed and hurt that there was nothing that could be done to make it better.
I have just tried to move on with my life. He randomly FaceTimed me once, but I missed it (of course) and I texted him to see if everything was OK, and he never responded. Another crazy part is that I was friends with his brother and all of my friends know him and the guys still see him, due to being good friends with his brother. But I have never crossed paths with him since. Thankfully I am no longer friends with that group, so the chances of running into him no longer exist. I think I am happier for that. It's been two years, so I don't have a log from how many times I called, but it was a lot as you can imagine.
Raina's case is interesting because it's different from most Boom, Ghosted submissions.
First of all, it's obviously different because they had been dating for FIVE YEARS. Also, they were serious enough to be going on vacation for her birthday together.
Nobody ever really expects to be ghosted by anybody, but you definitely don't expect to be ghosted by your long-term boyfriend WHILE YOU'RE ON VACATION.
Next, there's the fact that he sent her that long explanation text. I guess if you're trying to find a silver lining here, it could be the fact that she got more closure than most ghostees get in the form of that text.
But, honestly, I think that text makes him even more cowardly.
He gave her an explanation text, then never responded to her again? THAT'S how he decided to end things with his girlfriend of five years? It's just not right.
What do you guys think? Have you ever been through something like this? Do you somehow see where this guy is coming from?
Whatever the case, I always want to hear what you're thinking, so comment your reactions below!
*Names have been changed.