Why You Should Date A Chick Who Likes Rock And Roll

by Lauren Martin

Good music is almost as hard to come by as a girl with good taste in music. It’s hard enough to find bands like The Stones and The Beatles, but to find a woman who also thinks that John Bonham is more God than man is like finding someone in Brooklyn without a beard.

Now obviously it’s presumptuous for me to tell you what type of women is worth dating. But I promise, aside from being obnoxious, I’m just trying to expose you to a certain demographic of women. I’m just laying out an option, putting down an idea and dissecting a certain group of ladies the way we do with guys who like sports or women who wear maxi dresses. Assessing their attributes and their mentalities to enlighten you as to why a woman listening to The Strokes on the subway might be the perfect woman for you.

Because she represents so much more than the music she listens to. She represents the type of person who listens to that kind of music. There are a million facets of the girl who listens to rock, like her interests in art or the likely probability she smokes weed, which puts her in the most coveted of all groups: the stoner chick. But we’ve already talked about them. But just know if she smokes, she most likely appreciates rock and if she appreciates rock, she most likely smokes.

Obviously, picking up a woman in this group without stealing her iPod means finding her by spotting common attributes that all these chicks share. You can try to spot her based on personality traits. If she is passionate and exciting, there’s a good chance she’s into rock and roll. She’s most likely mysterious and unique. You can find her in dive bars and dark clubs. She’s in record stores and walking along the street tapping her fingers to some chord progressions.

She’s definitely at rock concerts, in coffee shops and smoke shops. She’s getting excited about an album of Led Zeppelin with the guy who sells used records on the corner of St. Mark's Place. She’s talking to some guy about the inconsistencies in Jimi Hendrix’s later albums and schooling some young kids on what kind of music they should be listening to while babysitting. So when you do happen to meet one, spot one and get to be near her, here’s all the reasons she’s the best chick you’ll meet.

Oh yeah, and a girl who likes rock and roll will probably hate this list. …

She’s easy to turn on, just put on a great guitar solo.

She understands rhythm.

She most likely smokes weed.

She’ll take you to Nirvana.

She’ll cry over a broken record, but never sound like one.

She doesn’t steal the covers, but finds you great ones.

She’ll never take you shopping for anything but albums.

She won’t hesitate to show you what “comfortably numb” is.

She always likes to leave on a good note.

She has cool friends, even if they're on vinyl.

She most definitely likes a good beer.

She has a cool collection of t-shirts.

She finds men with sticks a turn-on.

She would love to live on a bus.

She’ll stroke you to The Strokes.

She won’t make you listen to Katy Perry.

She’s no basic bitch.

She knows a good thing when she hears it.

She speaks in verses and lyrics.

She’ll teach her kids the ABC's of Led Zeppelin first.

She loves when you pick at her strings.

She doesn’t need diamonds or chocolates, just “Guns and Roses.”